Precarious (Severus Snape x Reader)

Chapter 30: Breathe

"What do I say?"

-

As soon as you crossed the threshold of Minerva's classroom, you regretted your decision. It was much too sensitive, too heavy to say aloud, and even with Severus standing beside you, a desolate, gnawing sensation ate away at your insides. In your heart, you really did want Minnie to know. She could provide amazing support and advice, that is if she did support you. That was the source of your fear. Being a disappointment or looked down upon by who you could consider your closest friend besides Severus. Minnie was almost like your mother, and you felt probably like every other young woman who has had to announce an unplanned pregnancy to their mothers. Horrified.

Severus stepped forward first, encouraging and coaxing you inside. You were reluctant to follow, so much less confident than you were when you made up your mind initially, and you kicked yourself for it. And then you remembered your analogy. This was just another question, just another exam, and you were good at it, you repeated to yourself. You could get past this. And just like an exam, the apprehension is always far worse than the challenge itself.

Breathe.

A full inhalation and exhalation later, you timidly advanced to the office door. He stood right beside you as you knocked softly and rubbed your thumb back and forth against his calloused hand. The silence swallowed you up, and you almost felt relieved by it, until the audible click of the lock sounded out, and you knew she was about to open the door. Bile rose into your throat, so much more severely than prior to the pregnancy, and you truly thought you might vomit right onto the floor. Severus' hand tightened around yours gently, grounding you, and you swallowed thickly as the door parted from the jamb and revealed an emerald-clad Minnie, with her glasses perched atop the bridge of her nose and her hair wound tightly into a neat bun. She appeared to have been scowling before she recognized that it was only you who wished to enter.

"Oh, hello, you two!" she beamed, eyes flickering back and forth between you.

"Good evening," Severus replied with just a twinge of uncertainty.

You couldn't formulate a response.

"Come in, come in! How are you doing? What can I help with?"

Severus shifted his weight from foot to foot.

What do I say?

He was more anxious than he was letting on.

"We just...wanted to speak with you, if you have the time," he said, seemingly forcing himself to lift one corner of his mouth slightly.

Minerva waved her hands in the air, motioning you inside. The familiar smell of pumpkin and vanilla surrounded you when you entered the quaint space.

"I'm sorry, allow me to find another chair," she said, then grabbed her wand between her nimble fingers. They danced over a few objects on her desk before she landed on a small, empty jar. She tossed it into the air in front of you, and you instinctively moved to catch it, but she nonverbally transfigured it into a plush brown armchair before it hit the ground, landing with a quiet thud. Her mastery distracted you for a moment, and you stood admiring her, fiddling with the hem of your robes, until she cleared her throat.

"Have a seat," she offered warmly.

You glanced at Severus and waited for him to move first before sinking down into the softness of the armchair.

"What do you two wish to discuss this evening?" she asked, removing her glasses from her nose and setting them on the desk.

You gnawed on the inside of your cheek until the taste of iron tickled your tongue. You looked to Severus again, and he must have sensed it, because his eyes flickered to you and he reached to the side to envelop your hand in his. It was a toss up between the two of you, both too nervous to be the first to speak. You took a deep breath and pushed onward.