I'm Not Your Secret

'Hanging Out'

The next day, I woke up and my internalised homophobia was a lot less present so I decided to call Eddie. After a lot of back and forth in my mind and thinking that the worst things would happen, I called his number. Waiting nervously as it rang and when someone finally answered I said, "hello? Is this Eddie?"
The person on the other line the replied, "sorry no, this is his uncle. Eddie's not here right now. Did you want me to give him a message?"
"Uh... no just tell him that Y/n called, thanks."
"Okay, will do. Good bye!"
"Bye." I hung up the phone and walked to the sofa. Relieved, I sat down and I was so glad that I had at least tried to call him.  It was like seven am where the hell would he be at this time? I didn't take him as the morning type person.

That's when all of a sudden I heard a knock at the door causing me to jump up to go open it. When I opened the door I saw a very out of breath Eddie standing outside.
"Eddie what are you doing here? How do you know where I live?!" I was visibly confused.
When Eddie caught his breath I let him inside and he said, "I asked Robin to see ur work file cause I wanted to come see you but didn't get ur number."
"Okay I'm gonna ignore how stalker-ish that is because you're cute." I said surprised. He smiled at me and I asked, "what exactly did you want to do?"
"I want to get to know you! You're one of the only gay peop..."he started but I cut him off.
"I'm not gay!"
"Y/n. Lovely Yn. Straight people don't blush like a mad man and loose the ability to close their mouth when a gay metal head flirts with them."
"I did not blush or lose control of my jaw okay... I just hurt my jaw when talking to you okay." I tried to argue.
He looked at me with a raised eyebrow and a smirk before saying, "you do know that I'm not gonna tell anyone."
"No but if I hang out with you, I'd fall in love with you then I'd not be able to hide how I feel and basically out myself..." I confessed not really knowing what I said.
"You'd fall for me?" Eddie smiled.
"Were you not listening to anything I said! I will end up outing myself!"
"No I heard you. I think you should let yourself fall for me because I know that I find you very attractive and could definitely fall for you." He flirted pulling me in by my waist.
My face was about three inches from his and after fighting the urge to kiss him I pushed him away abruptly. "No! I'm not gay!"
"Oh my god Y/n! Don't you ever get bored of that? This internalised homophobia you have is so annoying! Just accept it! You're gay! You like men! You like hot men! Actually no! You're the type of gay to not even need them to be hot! You just need men!" Eddie told me quite accusingly.
I stood there gob smacked. Rude of him to just assume things even if they are 100% true...still. I sat down on the sofa after being utterly ripped into. He sat next to me and wrapped one of his arms round my waist. I rested my head on his shoulder, no matter how mad I was about what he said I would never say no to a shoulder to rest on.
"I'm sorry for assuming so much." He apologised.
Begrudgingly I said, "It's okay, You're only stating facts. I know I'm g..gay but I just don't want to be berated and abused everywhere I go. That's why I moved here. People back home in England, especially my family didn't exactly like who I was. That's why I have so much homophobia towards myself." I confessed.
"It's okay, you didn't have to tell me that. I know that it was most likely hell for you. I honestly do find you attractive and want to get to know you." He comforted me.
I looked up at him and kissed his cheek, "that's all you get till I get to know you. Just one rule! I'm not gay when I'm with anyone but you, okay?" I made him promise.
"Okay! I promise." He smiled as did I.

"You also got to stop the stalker tendencies please. No looking at my work files." I brought up once I remembered how he got here.
"Yeah, I can see how that's weird now. But... you're hot and I wanted to see you." He flirted.
"Do you have a job Eddie?" I asked reminding me that I had work soon.
"Kinda..." he said suspiciously.
"What? Are you like a drug dealer or something?" I joked but he stayed silent, "you're kidding?!" He shook his head. "Wow! Eddie the drug dealer Munson!" I laughed.
"I think I prefer Eddie the freak Munson seeing as it's less likely to get me arrested." He pointed out.
I looked at him and just thought "God he's so pretty. I want to see his smile forever." When I snapped back to reality I looked at the time and said, "shit I'm gonna be late for work! Eddie you've got to go!"
"Let me come with you. I'll turn up there sooner or later." Eddie pointed out.
"Okay fine but we have to go now!"

I grabbed everything I needed and put my uniform on. Hurriedly, me and Eddie got into my car and I drove us to the family video store. Making sure the car was locked, I walked through the doors to a jealous looking steve as he saw a very smug looking Eddie behind me. "Seriously Eddie? With him?" Steve said obviously insinuating that me and Eddie had just slept together.
"Actually Steve, we didn't do anything and I'd like for you to not assume things about me." I said before going into the back to get movie to stock.
While I was out there I heard Eddie say, "he is one fine specimen, isn't he?" He was so lust-full for me, which I found oddly comforting.
However what steve said wasn't so comforting, "you know he's gonna break you're heart? I've met people like him before, he's doing this for his own gain. He's gonna hurt you."
Wow! Already assuming things about me again!
Eddie being Eddie had the best response, "I'd let him! He's just so amazing."

That when I walked back out with a box of movies and went to an empty shelf next to Robin. "Hey Robin!" I said.
"Hey Y/n. Seems like you've caused Steve to be jealous! I didn't think it was possible for him. Well done." She joked
"I've done nothing, not my fault Eddie likes me more." I joked back.
We both laughed and she then brought up my worst nightmare "I know what you are... It's okay I am too."
I laughed nervously but still said, "good for you but I'm actually not..."
"Gay?" She finished the sentence.
"No I'm not..." this was getting more difficult to say the more people who found out.
"Okay, sure and the sky isn't blue!"
"You can't tell anyone! Like actually. I will murder you! Not even steve!"
"I won't! I'm not an asshole but... you're not exactly good at hiding it...for a starters you're not from around here and you know what straight people are like! They see one difference and apply lots of other differences to you."
"Is this the 'I'm European' argument thing where everyone assumes European men are gay?"
"Yes..."
I rolled my eyes because that made me realise that life was going to be so much harder than I expected.

When my shift ended, Eddie who had spent the whole day in the store drove with me back to mine as he needed to get his van. "Y/n?" Eddie asked.
"Yh?" I responded.
"Can I possibly like stay over tonight? At yours?"
"Uh sure if you want to, I don't have many clothes you can change into I got like a spare shirt maybe."
"Thanks, I appreciate it."
He was honestly so smooth! he knew the British person in me would be too polite to say no to him. Would I have even wanted to say no though?
Oh my god I'm so gay.

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Sorry this part kinda ends weirdly the next part should be up soon.