A Terrific Surprise (Lord Farquaad x Y/n)

Careless Parting

"Y/n! Y/N!" y/n heard being shouted in her face as she awoke groggily to Shrek yelling her name, "Good, yer awake," he said, "what's all this?" He pulled part of the fur from around her, and held it, looking at the fluffy white edging, "And where's the fire gone?"
"Mmmhf..." y/n responded, too tired to say anything yet and rubbing her eyes.
"Haven't you got those fritters heated up yet?" Donkey asked her though she couldn't quite comprehend what he was saying yet, it felt like the night before had been one big blur. "Come on y/n, get up!" Shrek said, a little agitated, "You knew we needed breakfast today!"
"Do you have the stuff to make waffles?" Donkey said excitedly.
"Where'd the fire go?" Shrek asked again.
"Maybe if you'd bothered to come back last night I'd have been able to tell you what happened. Or, better still, it might not have happened." she snapped, groaning and pulling the fur from Shrek's hand and back around herself before curling up again on the floor. She was extremely tired from their long walk yesterday, not to mention waiting up and keeping the fire going for Shrek and Donkey who never made it back. "Come on, y/n! We all need breakfast!" Donkey whined, bending his neck down and peering into y/n's face. She grumbled under her breath and opened her eye's slightly, "I'm not going."
"What do yeh mean you're not going?" Shrek asked, confused.
"Maybe if you were here last night you'd know."
"You told us to go have fun! We only did like yeh told us we could!"
"You could've come home a little earlier, that's all I'm saying!" she said, finally sitting up to face Shrek. "We got a little tipsy, that's all, now how come the fire is out? We need to leave soon!" he said, much to y/n's infuriation. She scrunched her nose up at Shrek, pulled the fur over her face and slumped back to the floor, "There are cold fritters in the bag. You can have those."
"Fine." Shrek snarled.

Him and Donkey opened y/n's satchel and pulled out the paper bag of frog fritters. "I thought we left 4 each for this morning, who stole an extra one?" Donkey questioned.
"Y/n probably needed one for her 'busy day', right y/n?" Shrek asked sarcastically.
"Nope, wasn't me..." she answered through the blanket.
"Well of course it was you," Shrek said, "who else would it be?"
"This is exactly why I needed you here last night."
"Oh God, did yeh have trouble with someone? Yeh didn't get mugged did yeh?"
"Nope."
"Well then what happened? You're not giving us much to go on here, y/n."
"It was Lord Farquaad." she finally revealed.
"What?" Donkey shouted, "Why would Lord Farquaad be down here eating frog fritters?" Y/n sat up and made direct eye contact with Donkey, her tired, half-closed eyes making her look exceptionally sarcastic.