The dark diaries

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Dear diary, Jan 6th,2010
School is being a bit of a pain. Especially to my chest. Puberty hit me hard in 3rd grade. Lots of things hit me in 3rd grade. A lot. Today these girls in my class, Kimberly and Tiffany, were making fun of me. They started to talk about my lip... They say why is it so big? And other stuff. It really hurt me to hear them call me names and talked me down today. They don't know though. They don't know that I, Bigfoot, didn't want to have a giant lip on my face. I didn't want to have scars on my legs and face. I didn't want it all. But I do. I do have it all and it has made me feel gross about myself.  What did I do to deserve this? Is it because I started puberty in 3rd grade and got hairy legs, arms and under my arms? Is it because my breast started to swell and became painfully big for my age? Kids here are just mean. I keep asking myself why these days. I guess people don't like being different. Oh well. Anyways they hurt my feelings a lot. So I decided to show them what actually happen to me. I have a few pictures in my book bag of my accident back in 3rd grade. At the end of the day I was doing  Safety Patrol with them and a few guys. I pulled the pics out to show Kim and Tiffany. They started to laugh at them, saying how I'm a liar and that's not me in the pics. Well of course you can't tell how badly my face looked at the time. Both cheeks are swollen, my lip is busting out with blood and a rip skin all across my face. I barely escaped that dog on that fateful day. I'll quickly tell you the story. It was Saturday on March 23rd. I was wearing my favorite pink and white dress. Pink was my favorite at the time. I was only 9. My dad left to go to a trip with the other men in my church to a camp. So it was me, mom and Scooter. We arrived at church and stayed as the usual. Mrs. Cathy stopped us after the service. She offered my mom and us to stay at her house for lunch since her husband is away on the trip. We said yes and end up at their house. They love dogs just like us and have 3 of them. One was Sammy, the other one was Willie and their third dog lived outside in the backyard. One of Mrs. Cathy's friend said his name was Samson or something else. I don't remember. All I remember is playing with the big dog. This was my first time seeing a big one in real life. He was as big as me. Then something happen and I find myself trapped underneath Samson. I felt his body against my own and his razor, sharp teeth was all over my face.  I screamed and somehow pushed him off me scrambling to the corner of the yard. He was tied up against a pole licking the spot where I was. I looked down to see a deep gash in my left thumb and blood was dripping from my face. I screamed on the top of my lungs and ran inside the house. That's when my mom and Cathy came and screamed... I don't want to get much into detail of what happen but my bottom lip was completely destroyed. It was ripped up in shreds. I had a scar on right under my right eye. My left thumb was deep & open,exposing tissues and blood. I swear I thought I saw bone. I was given plastic surgery to repair the damage and fixed up my face with different  color stitches. End up with 62 on my face, lip and thumb. It was traumatic for me and still is to this day. After that, lots of lawful/ court stuff happen. My dad never left to go anywhere after that. My mom stayed by my bed, staring at my face. The doctor told her not for me to see it but I did. I looked like a freak. How could I live like this. My mouth was completely sown shut and I had to be fed with soup from a straw for 2 weeks. Lucky it was on Spring break at the time. After that I slowly healed but the marks and scars still remain on me today. If you passed by, you can still tell what happen. It was just terrible in third grade. Kids treated me differently. Everyone stared,even teachers. How could God allow this to happen to me? Why? Just why.

Love: Darkness