Socializing

Chapter 31. Blue Days

There has always been a part of me that needlessly cared about those in my life to the point where it broke me. Of course, no one ever knew this part of me, and I battled to stay mentally bright. Some days are blue for me and I simply let them be.

"I'm sorry I missed our date last week," he said.

Are you really?

"I figured you were occupied," I replied.

More like my existence ceased since she walked through your door.

"Kind of."

I looked at him and smiled. My, I don't really give a fuck at this point smile that he'd obviously never seen. I was not going to ask who she was and if he did not deem it important to tell me, then I would keep living.

"Well, I hope you had fun."

Three months we'd been dating, and she comes along and it's all for nothing. Human attachment scares the shit out of me. Why do we bother so much to keep relationships afloat? I do know why of course but then again...at what price? He smiled back and walked to his office. His ever so beautiful smile but this time, I felt nauseated. I needed a break.

"Ana, could you take over for a moment," I said to her when she was done adding more muffins. "I need some fresh air."

"Sure," she said. "Take all the time you need."

Home seemed like a good place to run to besides, it had been a while since I last walked on the beach. I could tell I was overthinking the Nina issue, but I let it be. Why does it seem that I am the one caring so much about how well we relate to each other? Too many questions, I know. Like I said, some days are simply blue.