The Burden Of Her Arms (Loki/Sigyn)

Chapter 23

Chapter 23

Night found her in tears. She hated herself for starting down this path, despised the love that pushed her to such torture. She prayed constantly for some kind of mercy. Her head fell forward, weighed down by the weariness in her bones.

Loki was fast asleep. She envied him. Resented him. Hated him.

The poison stopped. She looked up with wide eyes. The snake closed its mouth, flicked its tongue out, then turned slowly and left. She stared with a gaping mouth as it slithered down the tree and away. Lowering her arms, she emptied the bowl and set it down. Loki stirred.

"What happened?" He frowned up at where the snake was.

"It left." Sigyn whispered. She coughed and tried to clear her throat but it was desert dry and her jaw could barely open. She swayed where she kneeled.

"Go home, Sigyn. And stay there, for mercy's sake. You cannot do this again."

But she did. She slept and then ate and dressed and returned the next morning. Her body could barely hold itself and she wanted to slump into her mattress and sleep for a thousand years but she returned.

"Mama? Where are you going again?" Vali asked at breakfast.

"To help a friend who is very sick." She murmured weakly.

"Can I come?" Narfi wondered.

She rubbed food from his cheek. "No my dears. You must stay here with Una."

"But you'll be gone all day!" They whined.

She smiled sadly and kissed them both. "I know. I'm sorry. But Mama has to help him."

Loki stared when she knelt beside him again. The snake had already returned to its work. She rubbed a healing balm on Loki's chest, fed him breakfast, and lifted her bowl.

For days it continued. For weeks it dragged on. Even in the pouring rain the snake returned and she was allowed no reprieve. Her muscles withered from poor eating, her thoughts felt stuffed with wool from poor sleep. Loki's skin grew a sickly grey and his hair and eyes lost their luster. He shivered at the slightest breeze and had stopped trying to break free from the shackles. What poison had managed to make it into his system was doing its worst. He would surely die here. But still she kept on.

Loki began to tell her about his journey after his fall. His sneers and jabs lessened, his expression softened. He stopped telling her to leave. She listened patiently, absorbing herself with his words to distract from the pain.

"I fell through a wormhole the Bifrost left in its wake. It took me to an odd realm known by its owner as The Sanctuary. His servant revived me, imprisoned me. And then the master offered me an alliance."

"An alliance?"

"Mhm. He wanted the Tesseract. In return, I could use it to conquer Midgard and when he ravaged the universe, when he controlled everything, I could keep the realm. He told me Odin would see all I had amounted to; he would respect me. I thought there was no chance I could be king of Asgard. But Midgard? With a larger population, a people so desperate for a ruler to unify them... I agreed."

"And then?"

"Then he gave me the mind gem trapped in a scepter. It poisons you, invades your thoughts and draws you to your destruction. I gave in so easily, so happily. I never stopped to think of what I was doing."

"You didn't feel bad killing all those people?"

"Barely." He shook his head. "It felt normal. I had tried to commit genocide, a few people felt like nothing." He looked away, his eyes downcast and his mouth flattening to a thin line. "I was so caught up in the power, the gain... And then Thor came and knocked me about until I could see the damage. I looked out and I wanted to beg him for help. I wanted him to stop me. But just as quickly it was gone and I hated him. I wanted him dead and I was almost frightened of myself."