The Ghost and the McGee Twins

The Internship

One day, during one of our classes, Mrs Roop was about to assign us a project. "Get ready to learn about the relentless grind of 9 to 5 employment!" Mrs Roop says to our class. "It's Internship Week!" "What kind of weirdo gets excited about work?" Scratch wondered. "Internship Week?! Yes!" Molly cheered. "There it is." I sighed. "Oh, right." Scratch remembered. "This internship is the first step in my lifelong mission to enhappify the world." Molly explained. "First, I get an internship, then I get hired full time. Soon, I'm employee of the year, then decade, then I win a lifetime achievement award in enhappification!" "Your understanding of internships could not be more wrong, Moll." Scratch said. "Internships aren't about doing good. They're about doing someone else's work for free. Which is actually a great idea. BRB!" As Scratch went through a portal to the Ghost World, Mrs Roop was about to assign us to certain internships. "Our first internship is Pam's Cake 'n Bake!" She announced, pulling a name from a hat. "That's a good one because Pam is super sweet. And I'm not just saying that because I married her!" "I could enhappify a lot of people at the bakery!" Molly gasped. "The internship goes to... Libby!" Mrs Roop announced, pulling from the hat again. "Next up, Brighton Fish Market. Amber McGee." "I think I'm gonna throw up." I gagged, grabbing a hall pass before rushing to the bathroom to vomit.

So, according to Molly, it turns out that the fish market I was assigned to actually went out of business last year, so Mrs Roop ended up pairing me with Molly. I wasn't sure if this was a blessing or a curse. "Weird Larry's Pawn Shop?" Molly complained. "No! This is the place where happy memories go to die!" "Smell the disappointment." Scratch sniffed. "Oh, wait, that's just Larry's skunks." "Skunks?!" I panicked as Molly and I both got sprayed by skunks. "Interns!" Scratch shouted as two new ghosts came from the Ghost World. "Molly, Amber, meet my new interns." "Nice to meet you." Molly greeted as we both covered our noses and shook their ghostly hands. "Pleasure to meet you both. I'm Ghost Number 13." The dark green ghost greeted in an Australian accent. "They/them pronouns, please. And this is Reggie." "So, Mr Scratch, what would you say is your most effective scaring technique?" The lavender ghost known as Reggie asked. "Reg, I'm gonna stop you right there." Scratch said. "You and 13 are nowhere near scare ready. You gotta learn to walk before you can run, buddy, okay? Let's start by getting rid of this stink cloud." "On it, Mr Scratch!" Reggie exclaimed as he and Thirteen began cleaning up the odor from the skunk. "You should treat them better, you know." Molly suggested. "Either of them could be your boss someday." "It's a risk I'm willing to take." Scratch said.

Molly and I walked into the pawn shop followed by a few skunks. "Well, if it isn't my intern, and a tag along." Weird Larry said. "I'm also one of your interns." I explained. "My teacher is an idiot for assigning me a business that shut down last year." "The more, the merrier. Welcome to Weird Larry's Pawn Shop,  where I, oh, I mean, we... buy and sell weird and wonderful relics, reminders, and remembrances!" Weird Larry explains as a customer walks through the door. Surprisingly, I remember Mayor Brunson calling him Todd. "Look! A customer! Go greet 'em, girls!" "Welcome to Weird Larry's Pawn Shop!" Molly greeted. "How can we bring you joy today?" "Take my old junk." Todd replied, dumping his box out on the counter. "Okay, let's see what we have here." I said, examining the pile of junk. "We've got rusty pliers, a rusty fork, I'm not sure what this is, but it's also rusty." "Uh, sorry, sir, but we're gonna have to..." Molly began. "Take it all! Here's your cash! Have a weird, wonderful day!" Weird Larry interrupted her, paying Todd for his stuff. "Thank you and come again!" "I'm elated." Todd said, leaving the store. "Mr Larry, I don't want to tell you your business, but you just bought a bunch of worthless junk." Molly stated. ""Worthless"?" Weird Larry asked. "Did you not see this? Or this? Or even this? There's treasure everywhere, girls. If you know where to look." "Well, maybe. Oh! Look at this!" I exclaimed, pulling out a toy robot from the pile. "You're my best robot friend." A sound played from the voice box. "Don't worry, robot! Your previous owner may have discarded you and broken your mechanical heart, but we're gonna find you a new home." Molly said, until both of us were startled by Weird Larry smashing the toy with a hammer. "Yes! A vintage T-140X dual tone voice box!" Weird Larry exclaimed. "Just what I need to complete my top secret project!" "You have a top secret project?" Molly asked. "Several!" He replied. "And as my interns, you two can help me finish this one. By filing these here acquisitions!" "When do I get to scare, Mr Scratch?" Reggie asked, coming through a portal with Scratch and Thirteen once Weird Larry went to the back. "I don't know how to use this, sir." Thirteen explained, holding a hand fan. "Right now! Scare me up a bed, you two." Scratch demanded. "I need a nap." "I don't understand how that is relevant to..." Reggie began. "Bup-bup-bup." Scratch interrupted. "Say it with me, friends." "The place of an intern is not to question." Thirteen and Reggie said with Scratch. "What is a bed?" Thirteen wondered. "I'll show you." Reggie replied, showing Thirteen a doll sized bed and bringing it over to Scratch. "So, that's what we sleep on?" Thirteen asked. "Fascinating!" "I love having interns." Scratch chuckled. "That's great, but we're learning nothing!" Molly complained. "You're learning nothing." I corrected her. "How can I enhappify the world if this internship is ensaddifying me?" Molly wondered as both of us got sprayed by Weird Larry's skunk.

The next day, in Mrs Roop's class, Molly and I couldn't get the smell of skunk out. Can't say I blame our classmates for keeping their distance. "I brought cupcakes in the shape of turnips." Libby said, showing off her creation. "I learned how to make them in my internship. How cool is that?" "Super cool." Molly chuckled awkwardly, walking away from her desk to chat with Mrs Roop. "Hey, Amber." Cleo greeted. "Check out all these blankets I made for the senior center!" "That's awesome." I said. "At least you don't wreak of skunk."

Molly and I headed back to the pawn shop after school for our internship. Molly informed me of her plans to enhappify the shop. We started out by cleaning up the place. Wiped counters, mopped floors, clearing cobwebs, all while Scratch was bossing around his interns. However, things didn't sit right with Weird Larry. "What in the weird wide world has happened here?" He wondered. "Well, we did the filing just like you asked." I replied. "And maybe a little more, too." Molly added. "Now you can find things better." "Where are my cans? My kites? My broken watches? Don't tell me you separated them from the working watches." Weird Larry panicked, stopping his skunk from spraying us. "No, no, Vera. Don't go a-spraying. Molly and Amber are here to learn. And I'm sure they'll start at some point. Sorry, girls. I was happy with my shop the way it was. Put it all back." "But, but..." Molly began. "Please!" He shouted, returning to the back room.

As I was helping Molly restore Weird Larry's shop back to normal, I noticed Thirteen looking at my current progress in amazement. They seemed to be happy to be here. "You must really like antiques, huh?" I asked. "Is that what these are called?" They questioned. "Yes?" I replied. "Then yes!" Thirteen answered. "I've never seen anything like this before!" "Never?" I asked. "Not even during your life?" "Truth is, I don't know much about the Mortal World." Thirteen confessed with a frown. "I've never experienced this place before. I thought maybe this internship might help me learn more about it." "Are you saying..." I began. "I died. Before I got the chance to live." Thirteen finished. "Only happened to 12 other ghosts before me. Lucky me." "What kind of person is named Thirteen?" I wondered. "Wouldn't that be considered unlucky in the living world?" "I suppose." Thirteen responds. "I think I could give you a better name." I said. "A name like... Lucky." "Lucky? Yeah! I'm Lucky! I love it!" They replied as a portal appeared. "Thank you, Amber." "See you later, Lucky." I waved as they returned to the Ghost World.

After finishing up my task, I came in to see Weird Larry showing his secret project to Molly. "Sweet baby corn! Is that a mechanical dragon?!" I gasped. "Sure is. Made from recycled materials." Weird Larry explains. "You took all that weird junk and made joy!" Molly exclaimed. "Okay, dragon slayers." Weird Larry said, giving us a strainer and a broom. "You are up!" "Let's do this!" I exclaimed, just as Weird Larry powered up the dragon with a quarter. "Aim for the belly of the beast!" Weird Larry pointed out. "It's the key to everything!" Molly and I sparred the metal dragon and stabbed it with the broom handle. "Whoo!" Molly and I shouted, hugging each other. "I now crown the two of you Brighton's best dragon slayers!" Weird Larry said, crowning us. "And pretty good interns, too!" "Larry, you're a genius!" I complimented. "You've got to share this with the world." "Think of all the people you could enhappify." "Oh, no, Molly. You and Amber enhappify the world." Weird Larry declined. "I like doing my enhappifying one person at a time. And sometimes two. I'm just weird that way." "Can't argue with that." I smiled, just as Mrs Roop walked into the store. "Okay, McGee sisters. Time for your evaluation!" Mrs Roop said. "What have you two learned from your internship?" "Uh, so much!" Molly exclaimed. "We learned that running a pawn shop is like slaying a dragon! Only it takes more than a sword, it takes an open mind to slay the beast that is ignorance and..."

Once we got our scores back, Molly and I went to the pawn shop to share our scores with Weird Larry. "She gave me a C-minus?!" Molly gasped. "Speak for yourself." I said. "She gave me a B." "How'd you get a higher score?" Molly asked. "I wrote down things in my report beside the dragon." "But, you did learn something, huh?" Weird Larry asked. "I did. I learned that anything and anyone has the potential to enhappify!" Molly explained, which made me think about Lucky. Did I really enhappify them? "Thanks, Larry." "Interns of the Year." Weird Larry complimented, winking at us. Once he went inside, Scratch, Lucky, and Reggie came through a ghost portal. "I can't believe I passed this internship!" Lucky cheered. "I've been analyzing your scare reports and, uh, they're disappointing, Scratch." Reggie explained. "I'd really like to see you pivot that into an upward trend soon." "I told you he'd be your boss." Molly teased. "Drop it!" Scratch snapped.