la belle dame sans merci | carlisle cullen

13

Carlisle had felt like he was walking on a cloud all day. The minute he got home, it began to feel like a storm cloud. He didn't get out of the car for a second, a voice in the back of his head telling him to just leave the flowers in the car and sneak them in later. He dismissed it quickly, grabbing the three bouquets and taking a deep breath before he made his way up the stairs.

"You're home late." Edward commented before Carlisle was even completely through the door.

"Late is subjective." The blonde quipped, feeling his son's eyes linger on the flowers. "Where is everyone?"

"Hunting."

Carlisle couldn't help the breath he let out, "Good."

"Flowers?" Edward noticed with a skeptical eye.

"They're a thank you." He pursed his lips, setting two of the bouquets on the counter, "One for Alice, one for Rose."

"Trying to get in their good graces?" Carlisle didn't dignify that with a response. "Who's the third one for?"

"Me." Carlisle hummed, making his way to the stairs. Disgruntled to find his son on his heels.

"You haven't told her have you?" Edward asked, following Carlisle to his study.

The father turned an annoyed eye to his son, "We decided I'm not supposed to, right?" Edward nodded, "There's your answer."

"I figured you'd rather me ask than Rose." Edward said, putting his hands up in surrender, "I'm just.. worried about you is all." Carlisle flickered a look at the boy as he sat the flowers down on his desk. "Don't you think you're making it a bit harder on yourself? Keeping her company?"

Carlisle considered this, reasonably. Maybe it would be easier. He wouldn't torture himself with his growing love every day. Sure, she was his soulmate— he was drawn to her like no other. That didn't mean it was love at first sight. If he didn't know what she was supposed to be to him, it would have been much easier to turn away. Itwas the promise of what it was supposed to be that made it impossible to turn away, "I think it'd be harder to not see her." He muttered.

"I won't pretend to understand." Edward said quietly, leaning against the door frame. "I just don't want you to be in any more pain than necessary."

Carlisle bit back a venomous comment, gritting his teeth to hold it in. If you don't want me to be in pain, you'd let me tell her. It was useless to hold stuff like that back with Edward, he'd know weather you wanted him to or not.

Edward's golden eyes cast to the floor, "Why didn't you tell the rest of them that she's an immortal?"

The older vampire scoffed as he moved around his desk to drop into his chair, "It wouldn't make a difference and I do not think it would work in her favour." Edward didn't sit in the chair across from him but he did lean against the back of it. "Rose thinks any curse she'd lay would be up when she dies in thirty years. I think it'd just strengthen all your convictions to know she'll live until she's killed."

"How long?" Edward's voice was barely above a whisper.

"Since the seventeenth century, I think." Carlisle replied, a scowl forming on his lips. "My soulmate has been walking the earth for nearly two hundred years." The boy's eyes avoided his father's once more, "I find her just to have to keep her at arm's length."

"Carlisle, I'm-"

"I don't want to hear that you're sorry, Edward." Carlisle glowered at his son and the boy shifted uneasily under the gaze, "I know you're sorry but it changes nothing. Excuse me, if I'm short tempered for being chastised and interrogated every time I walk through the door." The patriarch took a sharp breath, "I would never, never put any of you through what you're putting me through now. Now, go. Next time any of you want to talk to me, it better not be about her."

Edward mumbled another apology as he headed for the door, body language that of a kicked puppy as he carefully shut the door behind him. Carlisle let his head fall into his hands, fingers lacing through his short locks. He closed his eyes, knowing the picture of her face would soothe him. As always there she was, laughing as she had been earlier.

Carlisle hadn't been able to put her words out of his head, I guess it's lonely, more than anything else. It shattered his heart in his chest. It distracted him from the thirst entirely. All he wanted was to take that loneliness away forever, for both of them.

Happiness, so close yet so far. There's nothing he wouldn't do to close that gap but there it would remain.