Strangers in the Storm ✔

Chapter 36: Letting Go

DAMIEN

A painful wave of adrenaline burst through Damien. One minute, he was dancing at his best friend's wedding, trying to figure out whether his ex still liked him or not, and the second, he was making out with her behind a privet hedge, trying to figure out if his life just got flipped upside down again.

A complex mixture of emotions swirled through his heart and his mind.

"I'm sorry." Roxanne breathed out. "I'm sorry, I got caught up-"

Damien sighed loudly and sat on the bench, his head dropping in his hands. A major, vocal part of him wanted this. The hope that he tried to keep under control fought its way out and roamed free through him. Yet, he feared he didn't deserve it.

For months, he kept at bay, convincing himself that one shouldn't take shortcuts to happiness. He resisted the urge to call her, to ease his own pain, to jump steps on his way to improvement. Even today, he kept away as much as his body allowed him.

Was this truly what she wanted?

"Damien..." Roxanne sat on the bench next to him, "Let's just- let's just dance and pretend that nothing happened. Let's not go there tonight."

Perhaps he could allow himself a moment of play pretend. Perhaps he could convince himself that he could go through this night without carrying it on his soul for months later on.

Maybe he did well enough to enjoy this while it lasted.

"Okay." Damien nodded and offered a hand. "Let's."

Roxanne hesitated, "Are you sure?

"Yeah, why not?" Damien shrugged and stood up. "But I have to say something first."

Roxanne's throat bobbed when he looked at her and her slightly widened eyes, frozen with fear. He didn't know what this meant to her or if it meant anything, but he knew what he wanted. She could decide for herself.

"I know it's been ten months." Damien began, catching her gaze as she tried to look elsewhere. "And I know that what happened between us wasn't easy. But I still mean it."

Roxanne looked up, "What?"

"What I said that day." Damien's heartbeat picked up the pace. "I loved you then and I love you now. I'm not over it. I can't shake you off."

The sparkling lights above them reflected in Roxanne's eyes, blurrier by the second.

"So, there." Damien let his hands hang by his sides. "That's what you're dealing with here. Whatever you do about it is your choice. I can pretend this hasn't happened and we'll continue with our lives. But it's your choice. Your move, Roxanne."

She said nothing. Her hand slipped inside his and she led him back to the dancefloor as if nothing changed. Damien accepted it. He was so tired of worrying about the outcomes of his emotions.

If she never spoke to him again, he would live through it.

Life went on and it didn't stop just because he wanted it to.

So, he stopped worrying, but he didn't stop hoping.

Through the rest of the night, Roxanne kept away for the most part. The party turned into a drunken, tired mess after 3AM and the newlyweds have already disappeared to their honeymoon. Damien sat around the empty table, Mona sleeping next to him.

"Hey." Roxanne approached the table. "We're gonna go."

Damien glanced behind her at drunk Addison, "Is she alright to drive?"

"We're gonna call a cab." Roxanne shrugged.

"Do you need a ride?"

Roxanne looked over her shoulder, "Uh... it's okay. You weren't planning on going home yet-"