Grace; misanthrope // Jai Brooks

Chapter 4

On Monday I walked into school with my head down, trying to go unnoticed. I already had to sulk in my misery for the entire weekend so I was really dreading coming to school where I had to be around people. There were whispers and stares as I made my way down the hall to my locker. Mr. Penk is on the loud speaker announcing something about the Winter ball coming up. But I try to drown out all the noise around me. Emma Cabot gives me a nasty glare although she doesn't say a word. I sigh, already knowing this day would drag. In study hall I take my seat, loathing being anywhere near Jai Brooks, my headphones already blaring some Soundgarden into my ears. I notice Jai is already sitting quietly in his seat behind mine. I avoid his gaze like the plague. I sit down and get to studying.

Not five minutes have gone by when I feel a tap on my shoulder. I peek over my shoulder and Jai is leaning over his table toward me, the scent of his cologne teasing my nose. I pull out my headphone just for a moment.

"Hey," he whispers.

"Yeah?" I say, trying to remain calm, albeit I was nervous to hear whatever crap was about to come out of his mouth.

"I'm sorry about the other night," he said softly.

I turned around to face him a little better, observing his face. God, was he hard to read...

"Whatever," I say, turning back around, replacing my earbud.

I go about the rest of the day trying to avoid the stares and comments. At lunch Bella and Chloe hurry up to me with concern.

"What happened to you at the party?" Chloe asks with worry, trying to keep her voice down as we took a seat at our usual table.

"Why didn't you guys call me after?" I whined.

"Sorry," Bella said. "I was busy looking after Chloe,"

"-and I was hungover," Chloe said, sympathetically.

"Nevermind that," I brushed over it. "It was because of suck and blow,"

"But so what? The kiss was an accident," Bella shrugged.

"And even if it wasn't, people always pull that shit to sneak a kiss," Chloe adds.

"It was Jai Brooks." I state with frustration. "What if he tells everyone? What if he's already told everyone? The whole school is going to think I made a pass at him and that I'm a complete loser."

"Who cares what he says," Bella retorts. "You know the truth. Fuck everyone else."

"At least Jai's the quiet one. You're lucky it wasn't Luke," Chloe says while chewing her food.

"Well easy for you guys to say when nobody bothers you guys. They're quick to mess with me,"

They look at each other for a moment, biting their cheeks, obviously unsure what to say.

"I'm sorry," I utter, holding my face in my hands. "People have been whispering shit all day. I'm just fed up,"

"You know we're always here for you," Chloe says. "I'm sure this will pass over and people will be worried about some other stupid thing in a few days,"

"True." I say.

Past Chloe's head I can see one of the tables of popular kids. They are laughing and giggling, not a worry in the world as usual. My eyes somehow land on Jai. He's looking back at me with his dark and puzzling eyes. Once our eyes meet, he looks away, refocusing back to his cackling group of friends.

Later, in statistics, David Waters enters the class room making kissy noises at me. I groan and look away. I pull myself together, reminding myself that I'm in the final stretch of the day. The thought of going home is beyond exciting to me and I do my best to focus on that.

Once school was over I drove out of the parking lot as fast as I possibly could, hardly missing Jai Brooks, cigarette dangling from his lips, and his equally annoying friends with the front end of my car. Once I reach my bedroom I flop onto my bed, appreciating the comfort of my own company. I lay there in my own peace and quiet. I throw my headphones in and listen to some Pixies.

I woke up to my younger sister banging on my door, letting me know it was time for dinner. I pick at my food and my mom asks how my day was. I think she can tell something is off but I do my best to fake a smile to avoid having to explain anything to her. All the while I still found myself thinking about that kiss...