A Taste of Darkness

Chapter 23: Unforgettable

Scarlett

Oh. My. God.

I can't believe I just blurted that out. I was just so annoyed that Elena wasn't going to give up when I desperately didn't want to tell anyone about it, that in the heat of the moment, the words just forced themselves out of my mouth. God, what am I going to do now?

Maybe I should take up that plan of crawling into a hole and never coming out.

Elena stares at me wide-eyed. Her whole body completely frozen as she just stands there in front of me with her mouth agape. It's feels as if the silence between us lasts a thousand slow, painful years as I sit on the bed awkwardly, waiting for her to say something, anything. I have never felt more exposed and embarrassed in my entire life- which is ridiculous considering she's Elena, my sister even if it's not by blood, it's not like she'd think less of me or leave me or anything like that. Though I'd understand if she did.

"You what?"

Well, she already heard me say it once before, so there's no point in trying to deny it now that she knows the truth. "I kissed Julio," I repeat, though it comes out as a quite, unsure whisper this time around.

"What? Why? Since when? Have I been missing something this entire time?" she asks, blurting out a flurry of questions all at once.

What? You already know the answer to that. Why? I don't know. Since when? Since a couple hours ago. Have you been missing something this entire time? I also don't even fucking know.

But all I manage to come out with is, "It just happened."

"How come you didn't tell me there was something going on between you two?" I could see the confusion and surprise in her face, as if she still can't believe what I just told her. Makes sense, I did kiss a fucking mafia boss.

Just thinking that is unbelievable. I can't believe that this is what my life has come to.

"Because there's nothing going on," I deny, shrugging my shoulders to appear as neutral and careless as possible. I didn't know why I had to try to appear and feel that way, I should just appear and feel that way naturally, because there really is nothing going on, right?

"Scarlett, if you two kissed then something has to be going on," Elena insists.

That statement made me quite angry and annoyed.

No. There. Isn't.

"How would you know? You're not me."

"Yes, I'm not, but I know you better than you know yourself. You're in denial because you hate that deep down you know I'm right."

Is it too late to go to the gym to see my beloved punching bag right now?

I lean back into the softness of the pillow behind me again in defeat, trying to receive a bit of comfort, trying to find the willpower to deny her judgements, but I don't. Instead I stare at the wall in front of me while my jaw becomes more clenched with every second that passes. I notice a painting hung on the wall that I hadn't noticed before, it's one of a beautiful landscape of the beach, the sky being painted in a familiar shade of blue. The blue of Julio's eyes.

Fuck, why is my mind drifting back to him again? I'm supposed to be forgetting about him.

How convenient that there has to be objects placed in here that remind me of him. Fuck you Julio.

I should probably get that painting removed.

"Shouldn't you be giving out to me or judging me right now or something?" I point out, realising that Elena is treating this situation as if I kissed any other regular person and not a fucking mafia boss, someone who is terrible, a murderer, someone who has no morals and never abides by the law.