Undercover Goose - book 6

Part 8 - Totally Cool

Jeremy climbed reluctantly out of the warm pick up, zipped up his parka and tried to start the motor of Dr Zhang's station wagon. It emitted a forlorn, 'Urrrgh - h - h,' and then there was dead silence until Jeremy said something vulgar and released the hood catch. 

 Licia, Miguel and I found the brushes and swept most of the snow off the hood and windows while Jeremy got Shawn's jumper cables and started to connect them to the pickup's battery.

 'That's no the proper way!' Dunc said. 'Connect to the dead battery first.' 

 Jeremy goggled at Dunc. 'Did that goose just tell me I was doing it wrong?'

'Aye, it is me talking to yeh. If there's any hydrogen around the battery and yeh get a spark yeh might cause an explosion.' 

'Who's the ventriloquist?' Jeremy asked me.

'No one,' I told him. 'Dunc can talk. Believe me, it is hard to stop him sometimes.'

'Canada welcomes all immigrants who speak English or French regardless of species, eh? Jeremy suggested.

But he carefully positioned the crocodile clips on Dr Zhang station wagon before connecting the cables to the pick-up's battery, while Dunc chanted, 'Red to red, positive to positive, and black to black, negative to negative.' 

 Jeremy climbed back into the wagon and the motor started with the customary roar from the leaky muffler. 'Get in,' he shouted over the noise, 'I'll take you for a test drive.'

Miguel and I carefully disconnected the jumper cables and Licia managed to get one of the frozen rear doors open so we could squeeze into the back seat where we were out of the wind. With the wind chill, the temperature felt about minus twenty Celsius. 

 Dunc sat on Miguel's lap where, he said, it was warmer. Jeremy fiddled with the controls until he found the windshield wipers and the headlights. 'Now,' he shouted above the noise from the muffler. 'Which one of these is the reverse gear?'

Licia leaned forward and pointed. 'It's got R on it,' she yelled. 'It's a stick shift.'

The gear box screamed like a dental drill as Jeremy forced the lever into gear and the station wagon suddenly jerked backwards.

'You're supposed to use the clutch,' Licia shouted.

'Oh! Yeah.' Jeremy spun the steering wheel and we backed rapidly toward the street, wheels spinning on the snow.

'Jeremy,' Dunc honked, 'Look out for that hydro pole, eh?' 

 Jeremy glanced over his shoulder, spun the steering wheel and the station wagon crashed through the snow bank and into the street.

'You didn't signal!' Licia shouted.

'Jeremy!' Miguel yelled. 'This is a one-way street! You're going the wrong way!' The station wagon swerved madly from one side of the road to the other. 

 'I'm driving backwards,' Jeremy laughed. 'So it's legal.' 

 'Slow down!' Licia screeched. 'It's slippery.'

A faint musical tinkle sounded and Jeremy fished a cell phone from his pocket. 'Yo, dude, yeah . . . totally cool, man!' he said.

'Look out!' Licia, Miguel and I shouted together.

Jeremy swung the wheel. We were sliding backwards toward an expensive looking car parked in a driveway. We all braced for the impact but the wagon skidded to a stop, perched on the snow bank, with the rear wheels spinning in the air. 'Put it in neutral, you idiot,' Licia snarled.

 'Hang on, dude,' Jeremy told the phone, 'one of my passengers is trying to say something.'

Licia reached over the front seat and jerked the gear lever into neutral and Jeremy meekly obeyed as she ordered him out of the driver's seat and took over herself.

 Jeremy continued his phone conversation while Miguel, Licia and I bounced the rear end of the station wagon sideways off the snowbank. We all climbed back in and Licia drove it carefully back to school, parking it neatly in the space Shawn had already cleared of snow.

'Licia,' I asked, 'where did you learn to drive?' 

 'My uncle lets me drive his tractor on his farm. It's a lot easier than driving a horse.'

Licia left the engine running to recharge the battery and we said goodnight to Shawn and Jeremy and we all walked back across Sumac Street to Licia's house except for Dunc, he flew.