Dave and Bambi Incorrect Quotes.

8 (a bunch.)

Damien: *staring at a clock*
Damien: I can't fucking read.
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Banzii, under the table with Damien: Is this a bad time?
Damien: YES IT'S A BAD TIME WE'RE IN A FUCKING EARTHQUAKE-
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Damien: Hey, it's your turn to wash dishes.
Banzii, possessed: I'LL WASH THE WALLS RED WITH YOUR BLOOD.
Damien: 'Kay, but before that, wash the dishes, also use soap this time?
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Damien: *Gets down on one knee*
Banzii: Oh my god, it’s finally happening.
Damien: *Falls over*
Banzii: The poison is kicking in.
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Damien, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.
Banzii: Hey.
Travis: Hi.
Dave: Hello.
Bambi: Hey!
Damien: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!
Tristan: We were out of Doritos.
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Damien: Hewwo.
Banzii: Hihiiiiii!
Travis: Greetings, Humans.
Bambi: Three kinds of people.
Dave: I want pudding.
Damien: Four kinds of people.
Tristan: WHAT’S UP FUCKERS?
Bambi: Five kinds of people.
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Damien: Everytime I hear someone talking about updog, I’m torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help them complete their joke.
Banzii: Okay, but what is updog?
Travis: Updog is a long sausage in a bun, often served with ketchup, mustard, onions, and/or relish.
Dave: Not, that’s a hot dog. An updog is when a new version or patch of an application is released.
Bambi: No, that's an update. You’re thinking of the fourth largest city in Sweden.
Tristan: Surely, that’s Uppsala, where’s updog is the giant spider in Harry Potter.
Damien: That’s Aragog. Updog is a symbol conventionally used for an arbitrarily small number in analysis proofs.
Dave: You’re thinking of epsilon. Updog is an upward-moving air current.
Travis: No, that’s an updraft. An updog is the modern version of a henway.
Banzii: What’s a henway??
Damien: Oh, about five pounds.
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Bambi: When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying 'Haven’t decided yet' is typically a good response.
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Felix: What if the 'g' in 'gif' is silent?
Damien: Go the fuck to sleep
Felix: What gif I don't want to?
Damien: Fuck You
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Felix: I slept for almost 12 hours but I might still be tired so lets go for 12 more just incase.
Dave: Felix, that's a coma.
Felix: Sounds festive.
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Felix: Okay, truth or dare?
Damien: Truth
Felix: How many hours have you slept this week?
Damien:
Damien: ...Dare
Felix: Go to bed.
Damien: I don’t like this game.
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Felix: I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.
Damien: You're like 15 years old
Felix: I MIGHT DIE AT 30!
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Cop: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.
Felix: Shit.
Damien: Wait, three?
Cop: Yeah?
Dave: OH MY GOD BAMBI FELL OFF!!!
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Felix: You know those things will kill you, right?
Damien, pouring another glass of whiskey: That’s the point.
Banzii, smoking a cigarette: We’re trying to speed up the process.
Bambi: *Nods while eating raw cookie dough*
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Felix: *Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff* Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB?
Damien: Bold of you to assume I was born at all.
Scibble: I personally was created in a lab.
Bambi: I just straight up spawned lol.
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Felix, setting down a card: Ace of spades.
Damien, pulling out an Uno card: +4!
Bambi, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you!
Dave, trembling: What are we playing-

(Ok that's too much but-)