One Too Many

Twelve

A/N:
•TW, mention of miscarriage and baby loss. Don't read If topic is sensitive to you. Xx

James' pov:

It was now morning and I woke up to see Riley asleep in my arms. She looks so peaceful and happy when she slept. I admired her while she slept until she began to stir.
"Jay?" She asked tiredly.
"Where are you?" She asked almost immediately. I had let my grip on her go, as to let her rest, and she was now super confused.
"I'm right here baby!" I said when she started trying to sit up.
"Oh. Sorry, did I wake you up, I was just wandering whe-" I cut her off,
"Riles, it's fine. I was already awake and I moved away to let you rest. You and I both know you needed it."
"Jay, I have something to ask you..." she trailed off.
"Anything babe!" I replied, scooting over to her. I picked her up, placing her in my lap while she rested her head on my chest and began to speak.
"What if I do get pregnant again and she hates me for it?" I'm confused about what she meant by that so I spoke up,
"Riles baby, what do you mean by that?" I ask gently.
"I mean, what if our daughter doesn't forgive me from moving on from her, what if I forget about her?" She asks, her eyes now full with tears.
"Ri, we have two daughters and you won't forget about them?" I said more like a question to her.
"No I know. I was talking about this baby, I had a feeling it was another girl." She admitted to me.
"Oh Ri, you're so cute. But I'm sure she won't hate you for it. If anything, she'll be proud of her mama for being so strong and brave through this. She'll be watching over us the entire time, she'll be waiting for us in heaven."
"James, what her name?" She asked me, looking me straight in the eye. I couldn't believe she wanted me to name him. Our baby girl (supposedly). I looked at her wide eyed before she nodded at me, wanting me to answer.
"I think her name is Daisie (Pronounced: Day-see) Raine (Pronounced: Ray-n)?" I asked her. She nodded smiling at me.
"I love it. It's perfect." She replies hugging me again.
"Mama and Dada will always love you Daisie, even if you never got to meet us or your big sisters." I said while placing a hand on Riley's stomach. I noticed Riley had a tear on her cheek now.
"James. You're the cutest." She said to me. She leaned over, giving me a kiss on the lips for a minute.

"Mummy. Daddy. Who's Daisie?" Hailie came in asking us about the baby. I looked at Ri who nodded sadly, telling me to tell them both. I knew she wouldn't be able to do it and would probably burst into tears half way through, she wouldn't want the girls to see that and it would break my heart even more.
"Okay, girls please come and sit on the end of our bed." I asked them. I pulled Riley closer as she buried her head further into me.
"Is Mama alright?" Hailie asked. She's just like me, knows when Riley's upset or hiding something from her.
"No, she's not. I'm going to explain to you both why Mama's upset because you're big girls now, okay?" They both nodded. I looked down at Riley for one last time before I told them. I sighed as I began.
"Mama had a baby in her tummy, meaning you were going to get a brother or sister. We were very excited to tell you both, but we had to wait until the baby was safe." I explained to them while stoking Riley's hair. They nodded and looked at me as I continued on.
"Well the baby unfortunately left us and isn't in Mummy's tummy anymore, we don't think anyway. Mummy had something called a miscarriage. We didn't get to meet the baby, but me and Mama both thought it was a little girl, meaning you would've had a baby sister. We decided to name her Daisie Raine. Do you have any questions or anything you're unsure of?" I asked them once I had finished explaining to them. Keila nodded.
"Yes Kay?"
"What's a miscarriage?" She asked innocently.
"You'll learn more about it when you're older, but for now a miscarriage is when the baby inside of a Mummy's tummy decides to leave and not come back." I explained to her. She nodded and then whispers something to her twin sister causing Hailie to nod. They both crawled over so they were closer to me and Riley.
"Mummy? Did Daisie not love us anymore?" Hailie asked while placing a hand on my baby's back, rubbing it up and down. Just like I do when she's upset.
"No Hails, she loves us all very much but unfortunately she's not going to ever live with us. She'll be watching over us the whole time though. I promise you." Riley said after turning to face the twins. Hailie and Keila both wrapped their tiny arms around Riley and whispered,
"We love you Mummy. Us, Daddy and Daisie." They were the cutest four year olds ever, I swear.

It was now around 2:30-ish and we had decided to set up a little memorial in our field for Daisie. We hadn't told anyone we were pregnant, so know one knew Riley had a miscarriage. We went to the shops and bought balloons, lots of blue, white and gold ones.   (A/N: I didn't want the traditional 'pink for a girl' and the flowers at the top were blue and I loved the pic so I went with blue. Flowers will explain more later on, enjoy) We went home and blew them all up and then moved them into the car. We decided to drop the girls off at West's apartment, considering everyone else was busy on such short notice. All of the old A-Troupe members loved the girls, considering they were the only A-Troupe kids.

We decided that in a few days we would have a 'get-together' with all the old A-Troupe and tell them about what had happened. But for now, we drove to West's to drop the girls off, luckily he didn't see the balloons in the back of the car because we had to walk up to the 4th floor to reach his apartment. We had a quick chat for 10 minutes before we left.
"Riles, do you want to go and get some flowers for her?" I asked as we walked back to the car.
"Sure. Good thinking." She replied. I looked at her and noticed she wasn't doing okay. She looked broken, upset and tired. I decided to stop walking and cup her cheeks with my hands and connect my lips with hers. She shortly kisses me back and wraps her arms around my neck and running her fingers through my hair. I pulled away from her and then gave a big bear hug, one I know for a fact that she loves. After I pull away from our hug, Riley wraps her arms around me and puts her legs around my waist.
"Carry me. Please?" She asks sweetly. How could I say no to her, she's just too cute.
"Anytime baby girl." I reply and continue to walk back to the car. I did get a few odd looks but ignored them and continue to carry my girl.

Once we're in the car, I drive to the florist to pick up some flowers for Daisie. I picked out a bouquet with blue flowers and some daisies in it, how could I not. Her name is literally Daisie. I walked back to the car with them and handed them to Riley.
"Jay, there beautiful."
"Just like my insanely hot wife." She blushes as I said that so I just smirk to myself.
"Did you like my comment baby?" I ask while chuckling at how cute she is.
"Maybe. I mean, I'm not 100% sure, you know?" She replies while smirking back at me.