MUFFLED GROANS

chapter 23 | Drinking

"Since we are both alone, can I talk to you about last night?" he does not keep quiet for too long, to my greatest relief, and brings up an interesting matter. "Sure."

"Have I made you uncomfortable?" he holds his cigarette down, and I realize that he has not forgotten what happened. "I mean, my memories are very blurry, for some reason. I must have drunk a bit too much wine, which caused me to not recall some parts, but...I feel like I did or said something inappropriate to you...and I don't even know if it all happened in my..." he does not end his sentence when I was listening closely, and his eyes expose some nervousness, once again. "In my head..."

"You didn't make me uncomfortable at all, Mister Jeon. Don't be worried," I tell him, honestly. "I did notice that you seemed a bit tipsy, but you didn't do anything inappropriate."

"Are you sure? I don't want you to be scared to tell me the truth, okay?" he doubts my sincerity, so I assert my statement. "I'm sure. I promise," I give him the proof that I am not telling a lie. "I'm relieved," he looks down and takes a drag on his cigarette, seeming distressed or hung up on this night and what happened.

I am scared that she might have forced him to do something. What if she sexually harassed him? What if she pressured him into kissing or having sex? I am so worried about it.

"If you ask me those questions, does that mean you don't remember the hug?" I attempt to figure out what is the issue that torments him, and he looks into my eyes. "I do remember that...I was just...It felt more like a dream than reality," he clears his throat and taps the ash off. "To be honest with you, I thought this only happened in my dream..."

"What did you dream of?" I cannot hold back from being nosy, and the answer his body gives me makes me feel like he does not want to talk about it. "Too many things...I can't tell what was a dream or what was n- I mean, I can. I can definitely tell, but yeah," his sentence lacks sense the more he goes on, noticing he is lost in his thoughts. "Did we...maybe..." he touches his lips and rubs the bottom one, thinking thoroughly before finishing his question. "Like, can you tell me what happened exactly when I came home? I gave you the pill and Arnica for your bruises, then we hugged, and I went back to my room- I mean, you went back to your room first, then I went to mine, and we never saw each other after that, right?"

"Right," I confirm the events but cannot help suspecting something odd. Why did he need me to validate the fact that we did not see each other after we both went to bed?

"Alright," he inhales on the small cigarette for the last time to end it, and he stubs it out. His right hand, which is now free, slides into his pocket, and he licks his lips. "Why did it seem like you were about to cry when you left?" he mentions what I hoped for him to erase from his memory, and I pet Choco, who lied down on my lap, without saying anything at first.

"I just...appreciate and like the person you are a lot, so I care about you, and I'm worried," I tell, in the most vague manner possible, but he solicits some more explanations with a 'Why?', making it hard for me to not tell the exact reason. "Well...my mom is very manipulative and can get whatever she wants from men. If she wants something from them, she'll do literally anything to get it...and this time, I know you are a good man, I know you don't deserve it, so I want to warn you and protect you from her, but I feel like I'm powerless and that you're gonna fall for it like the others did, so I'm scared."

"Listen...I had a conversation with her last night, and she told me that she is your stepmother," his words get my head to move up quickly, wondering why she revealed that to him. "She told you?"

"Yes," he peeks down at my feet. "But she told me that you were used to not getting along in the past but that now it's alright. I just cannot understand. From what she tells me, everything's going well between you two, but from what you tell me or Matteo, nothing's okay, and you don't feel good with her or at home. I'm just wondering what is truly happening because I care about you as well."