You Can't Hurry Love

26| Mama Jones

FP sits on the couch in the living room with Alice. The topic of his mother being around and asking to see FP has been a touchy feeling for FP. Alice knows how hard the decision to see her is for him.

"If it's something you want, then you should try to talk to her. Would it bring you closure? I'll be there to support you if you need me." Alice squeezes FP's hand reassuringly. "But you don't have to do something if you don't want to."

"She left me with him. She abandoned me, Al. I know he hurt us both, but it kinda hurt more when she left." FP has contemplated a lot on the matter. "Is that selfish of me?"

"No, honey. You have a right to feel this way about her leaving."

"I know I said I didn't want to leave. That's because I didn't want to leave you...or our friends. But that didn't also mean I wanted to be left behind."

"I know. You don't have to explain yourself for feeling this way. It's up to you what you want to do from here. There's no pressure."

FP sits silently for a bit before making up his mind. "I think I want to see her. I want to show her that I ended up fine. I have the best son, the best girlfriend; I'm happy now. Her damn sleazy ex husband didn't ruin me forever."

"Girlfriend?" Alice smiles.

They have yet to officially discuss labels, but they were very much committed to each other.

"Is that okay?" He asks insecurely.

"Yeah, I like that." She offers him a kiss. "It just means I have a pretty sexy boyfriend."

"Sexy, huh? Keep talking."

"Don't push it, Jonesy." She giggles.

+++

FP stands out front of his childhood home. The chills run down his spine thinking of what everything that occurred inside has cost him.

"Do you want to do this alone first?" Alice asks FP.

"No, please stay with me."

Alice nods. "I'm not going anywhere." She takes his hand into hers. "We're in this together."

They walk up the steps and FP knocks on the door. He braces himself for when the door opens.

His estranged mother yanks the door open to see him. He's no longer that young teenage boy she last saw years ago.

"Oh, look at you, baby. You're all grown up." She glances over at Alice. "You, too, Alice. It's nice to see that the two of you stuck together."

"I was told you wanted to see me," FP tells his mother. "How come? Afraid I actually managed to drown myself in liquor like him?"

"Can't a mother visit her only son?"

"You didn't bother to before." He has been back for months. He didn't know where she ran off to, but he knows she keeps in touch with some of the older Serpents in town. He knows they would tell her he was around the minute he showed up to town.

"I'm not sorry for not attending his funeral, junior. I made peace with my choice."

"Neither am I. I wasn't there." FP shakes his head. "That's not what this is about. You dropped me out of your life so easily, mom. Did I not mean anything to you?"

"I wanted you to come with me."

"It wouldn't have been that easy."

Her eyes drift to Alice. "I wonder why."

"I'm not mad you left. Honest. He was a living nightmare." FP tells her. "I'm mad you left me. It hurt me." He scoffs. "When you left it's like you chose to forget me too. I never heard from you. There's a lot more I can say, but I did a lot of thinking last night. It's not worth it. I'm done fighting and living in the past. I just want to forget all about it and move forward."