lover's mercy - jaime lannister

TWENTY-TWO

The next day, she did not wake up, she simply got up. She had nightmares all night, full of despair, and then for the rest of the night, she laid there in the darkness until the sun rose.

When it did, she got ready and made her way outside. It was quiet as dawn just made its home in the sky and she walked through the camp absentmindedly.

Steffon Baratheon was wide awake. He hardly ever slept and currently he was drawing the sunrise until he spotted the Stark woman.

He was mesmerized by her and her beauty. Renly had even teased him about it.

"My little brother who doesn't like anything but you like this one girl," Renly smirked and ruffled his hair.

He pushed him away playfully, "Shut up."

"I merely admire her," Steffon declared.

"Admire her beauty, you mean," Renly said and Steffon gained red cheeks.

It wasn't often he thought anything was beautiful. But Elyanna Stark was, not only for her face, but for her perseverance.

So as he watched her walk through the camp, his drawing became one of the wolf girl. But he didn't realize he'd been spotted.

Suddenly, when he looked up, she was gone and then he turned around to find her and her arms were crossed, "Why are you staring at me?"

He replied nervously, "I suppose when you say it like that it sounds rather creepy but staring isn't a crime."

"It will be if you keep it up."

He began to smile, "Staring at you, Elyanna Stark, is a crime I'd die for."

She shook her head as she analyzed him and she saw the piece of paper and quill, "You were drawing me?"

"It's one of the few things I like in this world," he admitted.

"Well, if you're going to draw me, you might as well do it properly," she walked forward and waited for him to catch up. "Come on."

_____

Elya stood by a cliff, frozen like a statue for his drawing. Steffon sat on the ground as he drew her. They talked as he did so.

"When did you start drawing?"

"I suppose when I was quite little," Steffon hummed. "I didn't have anything else to do so my maester suggested it."

"Your maester?"

"Maesters and wet nurses practically raised me. I was still only a babe when my parents died in the shipwreck. They still hadn't given me a name; couldn't come up with one. So my brothers all agreed that I'd be named after my father," Steffon explained before pausing sadly. "I hardly knew my brothers, though, except Renly and even he only stayed for a time."

"I'm sorry," she said softly.

"Why? You didn't wrong me."

"But I think it sad," she argued.

"The world is sad," he said firmly like it was set in stone.

             "Maybe or it's just right now. Either way, you have the sea right in front of you. You can just get on a ship and sail away from it all," she looked at the endless horizon and it seemed like a dream.

             "Do you want to sail away?"

               Tears filled her eyes and she breathed deeply like her pain weighed her down, "Sometimes, I do."

            She looked at him, "Have you ever sailed?"

           "No," he answered. "Maybe I'm a shut in. I suppose the rest of the world never fascinated me...but you do."

             "Why? Because I'm beautiful?" she asked with an eye roll.

            "No," he shook his head. "Although, you are beautiful, I feel you and I are the same."

            "How is that?"

           "That look in your eyes. Perhaps you don't want to get out of bed in the morning because there is nothing worth living for. But we do it for the few people we love," Steffon said. "We carry on, for others, but not for ourselves."

             Steffon had gotten up and handed her the drawing. As she looked at it, she realized she did in fact look sad. Her eyes looked haunted and as she looked up at him, she noticed his looked haunted by despair, too.

              "We carry on," she agreed before she looked at the horizon. "But we wished we stopped."

               He reached out and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as he smiled softly, "Not always."

                "I'm glad I carried on to see you, Elyanna Stark."

                _____

              They were walking back to camp and she looked at the drawing with a soft smile, "You know, you're actually very good."

               "I am?" he started to smile nervously before he slipped and fell in the mud.

                 She brought her hand to her mouth to stifle her giggles and she apologized as she offered her hand to him, "I'm sorry."

                   He grabbed it and she attempted to help him up but she ended up slipping and falling in the mud right beside him. Then she really started to laugh and it had been so long since she had.

               "I don't know how we're going to get out of this," she said with a smile.

               "Neither do I," he smiled as he got on his knees before getting to his feet unsteadily.

             She did the same but then she started to slip and he quickly grabbed her to steady her. His hands were on her waist and they were very close together.

               She looked at him nervously, "Thank you."

                He nodded, swallowing, and let go of her. They took steps back from each other like it was a sin to be so close.

                "I...am now completely unclean and I need to be presentable," she said as she started walking towards her tent. "I will see you later I presume."

                He nodded before he called out, "Elyanna..."

                She turned back to look at him and he said softly, "I hope one day your feelings will change and you will not just merely carry on."

                 She gave him a small smile, "I hope the same for you."

                And she walked back to her tent as Steffon watched her go. With someone by his side, he no longer felt as insignificant and lost. He never had anyone to look up to growing up; he never had a purpose. But he thought he found one in Elyanna Stark.