Salute » Harry Styles

Chapter 38

» Chapter 38 «

Death is ugly. Death is not something someone can get over with in just a second. Losing someone is like losing a piece of you that made you euphoric beyond words. The first feeling that comes when the tragic news is delivered is shock. Denial comes right after and you cannot help but know that the person you lost is still alive and well. When someone is elderly, you know their time on earth will be cut short. But when the person is a twenty-two-year-old blonde haired, blue-eyed woman, you do not expect death at all. And to know that your boyfriend's sick, twisted father and fucking ex-friend killed her makes your blood boil. It makes you want to claw their eyes out and give them the pain that they gave you. But then you slowly realise that your twenty-two-year-old blonde haired, blue-eyed friend's death was all because of you. You could have stopped it, you could have fought harder. But you were too weak and stupid and watched her die before you. And for that, you deserve hell.

Well, that is where I am right now.

"She's still the same." Harry's familiar voice says. "What about Jesy? Or the other girls? Are they okay?"

No one responds to his question and I assume he is on the phone or the person is speaking softly to him. "I'm so worried, mate. When will she get better?

"Did you talk to Zayn? I mean, I don't blame him for behaving that way but he has to stay strong for the baby."

Footfalls come into the room, the sound of the curtain opening is enough to wake me up. Peering through the bright sunlight, I rub the sleep out of my eyes. When did I get in bed?

"I'll call you back," Harry says into the phone. I blink. "Yeah, she's awake. Bye."

I bring the duvet up to my shoulder, nuzzling my face into it. The room is cold and I am already shivering.

"Jade, fuck," he mumbles. Seating himself on the edge of the bed, he touches my forehead. "I was so worried."

"What... what happened?" I ask in a voice so small, I would have thought it belonged to Shriya or any other child.

Harry frowns. "When we got out of the hospital that night, you just fell to the floor before we left the building. I was so worried when the nurses got you into a room and told me it was just shock. They... they told me you would wake up right when you got here. Y-you didn't. And... and I got so scared that you got a heart attack or something, I don't know. I was just... scared."

"How l-long have I been out?" I ask.

"Jade," Harry says with a sigh, shaking his head. "I don't think you want to know."

I nod my head once. "I do."

He sighs again. "Four months and two days. Well, four months, two days, seven hours and seventeen seconds."

I do not show any sign of emotion, any sign of shock. Four months?

"You scared Shriya, you know?" Harry says softly, running his fingers through my hair. "When we brought you home and you were in my arms, she thought you... you know were gone. Gemma and I begun to believe that but not little Shriya. She kept telling us you were going to wake up because you love us all. And you did..."

My lips suddenly quiver. I do not know what to say, how to act or feel right now.

"Hey, don't cry. Please, baby, don't cry. I don't want to see another tear fall from your beautiful eyes," he says softly. Sniffling, I bite my lip to squelch my upcoming sobs.

"It hurts so much," I say softly and I cannot stop the tears from falling from my eyes.

"I know," Harry mumbles, holding me to his chest as my tears splatter his shirt. "But everything gets better. Everything happens for a reason. Perrie’s... passing happened for a reason. I know you loved her, we all did. But she wouldn't want you sitting here crying, love. What would she say if she were here with us?"