Hades Ain't Got Nothing on Us

Ch. 22 - ξενία (Xenia)

The King of the Underworld was not the monster Rob had pictured. Most women would be thrilled to have him as a husband on his looks alone. He was tall, dark and handsome, and clad in a hunter green crew neck and a black tailored coat from the Industrial Age. He wore a single pewter chain around his neck, and a simple black band engraved on his wedding ring finger. He looked to be in his mid thirties.

"Robert, you made it. Perhaps I've underestimated you. You must be famished. Please, let us sit down to dinner."

Rob was speechless at the inside of the bastion. Miles high, the vaulted ceilings echoed their footsteps across the endless halls that distended every which way. The interior palate was austerely gray, and there was no feminine touch to any of the rooms they passed. To anyone who didn't know, it would seem the castle did not have a queen.

Hades stopped in front of a unique doorway of deteriorating femurs. He motioned for Rob to lean inside. It was an ossuary decorated with the skulls and bones of at least one hundred corpses. "Meet the wretched mortals who dared enter my palace, never to leave. Technically, if you fail, your bones will remain on earth, but I may retrieve them. They would be nice to have for posterity. I have a lovely place picked out, right above my wife's headboard. She can remember everyday how she killed you, and that your soul is mine - not hers."

Hades chuckled to himself. When Rob did not join him, he regained seriousness and continued to take him to the dining room.

"I have to say, as much as I wanted to keep you on the Styx forever, I also wanted to meet you in person. You are a peculiar mortal."

Rob didn't know whether to be flattered or insulted.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Several things, but mostly, this game you are playing with my wife."

"It's not a game. I am serious about the way I feel about her, if you couldn't already tell by my being here."

Hades ignored him while they passed through a corridor lined by Goya paintings Rob had never seen.

"Our home is comely, is it not? Hestia has blessed my wife and me. I had this built from scratch in 1926."

"I hope you'll accept these tokens of my appreciation for your hospitality."

Hades picked selectively through the cornucopia.

"What an assortment of fruit," he declared. "You've included a whole range of earth's offerings. All that is missing is an apple. It is Cerberus' favorite, but then again, you know that. What a comfort it must be, being in the care of four gods."

They entered the banquet hall, which was nowhere near as warm and cozy as the diplobrats'. Every night, Hades ate inside a dank cave, sinister and dispirited with candles lit in human skulls. Pomegranates and dried asphodels hung from the ceiling, a brazen passive-aggressive ploy to torture Sephy.

She sat at the head of the empty stone table, staring hungrily at a nonexistent plate of food. Haggard and disheveled, Sephy was scarcely identifiable. Her shining locks were dull and tangled, and her tanned skin was pale and smeared with soot. She paid no notice to Hades' entrance into the room, even when it triggered a half dozen servant souls to set the table.

"Include these in the feast."

A vibrant young woman relieved Hades of the cornucopia. She looked more like Sephy than Sephy did, especially with their matching pallid complexion.

"My Queen, are you not going to greet our dinner guest?" In no hurry, Sephy raised her head. "No!" she wailed.

"Do not upset yourself yet, dearly beloved. He is only visiting, for the moment."