Blyler one shots

Thats the way it is.

Wills pov:

We scrambled out of the yellow van, holding our breath as we make our way towards el, who is currently crouching on the ground and bleeding out of her nose. There's an explosion in front of us and I'm pretty sure she just blew some kind of bad guy up but I'm to focused on her to pay attention to the dust and bodies that surround me.

I watch with slight tears in my eyes as Mike runs as fast as I would say he's ever ran and immediately put his hands around her jaw. "El!" He shouts, his face softening while he wraps his arms around her. She does the same to his neck and I can only stand behind them, watching their eyes lock together and if anyone had seen them in that moment they would be able to tell it was true love.

The salty water fills my eyes but I quickly blinked them away, I guess you could say I was feeling a bit ashamed of crying. I suppose I was always ashamed but right now I don't deserve to be the one crying. El Just went through god knows what and well...mike was her boyfriend; no one would want their significant other to experience those kinds of things.

But even though I held back the tears and kept my mouth shut, the jealousy and pain was still there, it was always there. Sometimes I wonder if simply not existing would cause less pain then the pain I feel whenever I watch them kiss.

The boy I treasure so much completely forget about me the moment his lips meet with my sisters. And the worst part is I can't be mad at either of them about it, it's not her fault she fell in love with him. Anyone would, even I did. But I can't blame him either and I think that's the worst part. He's not gay. I know he's not gay. In fact if he knew I was gay he probably would only think less of me.

But that doesn't stop the fact I dream about his face at night. The fact every time we make eye contact he sets every part of my body aflame. It's as if the whole world is just a game and god is playing with me like a puppet on a string. And I can do nothing about it but cry.

Cry and watch, watch and observe. Watch the way her face brightens up when he kisses her, observe the way he holds her waist, and cry knowing that there is nothing I can do, nothing I will ever do. And sometimes I'm scared to wonder what would happen if I did do something. El would hate me. Mike would be disgusted. No one at school would let me live it down. My own brother would look at me a different way. But that's just the way It is. And the way it's always going to be.