3️⃣ What Next

14. Awkward moments

The doctor finally comes back in with my medicine. Billy and I hadn't really talked much. He was dozing in and out of sleep until the doctor came back.

"You're all set Ms. Henderson." He says
Handing me the the medicine. He looks at my chart then back at me. "So I have to ask, when's the date and what will be your new last name"

"I uh, uhm" I stammer over my words.

"We haven't decided on a date yet, but she'll be Mrs. Hargrove" Billy says saving me once again. I just smile at the doctor.

"We'll congratulations to you" he says shaking my hand.

He leaves. Billy stands up. I put my coat back on and I stand up. Billy holds out his hand from in front of me. I take it and we walk out. "You okay babe" Billy ask.

I wanted to say no but Billy and I had promised to always communicate our feelings so I paused in the parking lot. It was snowing and I was shivering. I stoped. He kept walking until he felt my hand drop. "What's wrong" he says standing from me.

"We're not ever going to get married, are we?" I ask. I knew the answer. I knew that Billy didn't want to get married. He had told me he only proposed because he thought it was what I wanted.

"I just don't think I need a piece of paper to want to be with you forever." He says standing in the parking lot.

"Then why'd you lie to the doctor" I ask. I was shivering and watching the snow fall around Billy. He was tired. I could see it on his face.

"I didn't baby" he says reaching out for my hand again. I didn't want to take it. "I love you so much. All that ring did was cause us problems. It made me feel like I was suffocating you and myself. We don't need shiny rings to be in love" he whispers.

I nod. I look at the parking lot now being blanketed in snow. I knew what I wanted to say. I was afraid. I didn't want to lose Billy again. So I just nodded.

I started walking back to the car. I didn't speak him as we walked. I was processing what he said. I loved him so much. I wanted nothing more than to be his wife. His logic made sense.

When we finally reach the car he looks over at me. "What are you thinking baby" he whispers. I just shake my head. "I'm good" I smile.

He hangs his head. "Tell Me" he whispers angry. I didn't want to fight. I just wanted to move on from the topic. I just looked forward.

"Goddamit y/n" he yells he Pounds the steering wheel. I couldn't help but flinch. "What the fuck do you want from me" he yells. "I am so fucking tired of the back and forth with you. You're hot then your cold with us. I have had about enough of these fucking games. You wanted communication here you fucking go. Here's me telling you how I feel." He starts the car and speeds off.

I was shocked. I felt frozen. I felt like I was in a bad dream. I had no idea that was how billy felt about us. I didn't realize how Billy felt about our relationship. We were almost home when I say "please don't ever feel like you have to make me happy. I am so sorry I made you feel like we were 'playing games' when all I wanted was what is best for us and our family" I say as we pull into the house.

I grab my medicine and then open the door. "Y/n" he says as I do. I just continue to walk. I hear him shut the car door. "Will you please wait" he says as he walks up to unlock the door.

"I'm sorry I lost it back there. I'm just really tired." He says unlocking the door.

"No problem" I say. Following him in the door. I wanted so badly wanted to tell him that I was hurt by this yelling outburst but I was to tired to fight. I figured it would be easier.

When we walk in the house he tosses his keys in the basket. I can see on the clock that it was 4:16am. "I'm going to sleep in my room tonight. The doctor said I was contagious for 24 more hours. I don't want you to get sick especially if I'm already sick" I say as we walk up the stairs. The truth was I didn't want Billy to see me cry. I knew it would start a fight, and Billy and I both knew that we were good at fighting.

I was literally sick and tired. I Had strep throat, I had only had a few hours of sleep, and sick of Billy's 'games' and tired of fighting with the one person I loved more than anything in the world.

All he did was nod. When we hit the top of the steps. He bent down to kiss me. I turned my face and he connected with my cheek. "Fuck it" he says as he walks to the bedroom.

Yeah, one thing I agreed with. Fuck it what was the point anymore. Why keep trying, why keep telling billy how I felt, communicating like he wanted me too. When I did he yelled at me.

———————

That night I got no sleep. I sat on my bed and looked around my old room. When I looked at the window, I remembered Billy sneaking through it. But I also remembered watching him leave with Mel when we first started dating. I felt the bed. The bed where I lost my innocence to Billy. Where he made all those promised to me that same night. All the promises he'd broke. I looked at the vanity where I'd got ready everyday for years. Where I got ready the night I'd met billy. The same vanity I watched Macy sit at not even 2 weeks into one of our infamous break ups.

As I looked around flooded with memories. I noticed the sun coming up in my window. Just then I heard Scarlett crying. I went into the room. Billy was still asleep. I quietly lift Scarlett out of the bed. She was warm again. I took her downstairs. I gave her some of her medicine and I also made her some breakfast. I started to feed her. She wouldn't eat and just fussed. Her forehead was so hot. I decided that I needed to call the doctor. So I did. They told me to bring her in as soon as possible. I left a note that said where we went.

I got her ready and took her to the doctor. When we got there they took her temperature. And took her to a room. She was so fussy and clingy to me. She just cried and cried.

The doctor examined her. Then looked at me and said "I'd like to start an IV for her to get some liquid. Not only does she have strep, I believe she is dehydrated as well." I nod and rock her.

"Follow me and we'll get that started" I do and they took her to the room and gave her an IV. I held her and rocked her. She was already looking better. She slept and her temp was going to down dramatically. As I rocked her she cuddled into me. Just then the door opened. It was Billy. He looked at me and his shoulders slumped. And a
He exhaled deeply.

"What happened" he asked. Rubbing her back and kissing her cheek. She just kept sleeping.

"Strep and dehydrated" I say while rocking her and rubbing her back. I stared down at her.

"Why didn't you wake me up" he ask sitting in the other chair.

"I was already up and they said to get her here quickly" I say softly.

"She's my daughter to y/n. You can't just always do what you want when it comes to her" he says throwing his head back in the chair softly.

"Next time she has a high fever and won't eat I'll be sure to waste all the time in the world to make sure 'daddy' is out of bed" I whisper back to him. "Maybe you should just leave Billy. If all you came to do was start problems and tell what a bad person I am for looking after my child" I say now looking at him.

Billy stands up and leaves. He slams the door on the way out. Scarlett jumps. I hold back the tears and looks off to the side.

After about an hour the doctor comes in and unhooks her IV and places a bandaid where the needle was. Her fever was gone and he prescribed her some medicine to help with the strep. We took our things and and carried her back to the car. I put her back in her car seat and we head home. She slept and looked so sweet and peaceful.