Forty-Five

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"I couldn't even be there for him when he needed me!" I screamed. I smashed a tree. "And after all he's done for me...never giving up on a useless brat like me." I pumeled another tree to the floor. Everywhere I looked around me, all I saw was destruction. It reminded me of the war, and it continuously sent me over the edge every time I thought about it. "DAMN IT ALL!" I screamed with tears leaking down my face. "It's not fair," I cried, slumping to my hands and knees.

I had no where to go now. I didn't have a clue what happened to my crew. I don't even know if any of them are still alive. Where was Marco? Did he make it out okay? What about Izo? Haruka? Jozu? Lucky? Grape? Chuck? Anyone? What if I was all alone again?

Just the thought of being alone again with no family or home shattered my heart, soul, and pride and shed more tears and sobs. I wanted my brothers if nothing else. Even if I got one wish, I would want them, even just one to come and get me. I sat back on my calves and hugged myself, eventually getting into a criss-cross sit. I sniffled. I didn't want to be alone anymore.

I decided not to go back that night, and I just stayed up all night. I didn't go back the next day, either. I didn't have an appetite, so I just sat against a tree trunk. Then, I moved to sit with my legs dangling off of the cliff. I sniffled occasionally as I stared at the open waters.

"Mind if I join you?" I didn't respond, so Rayleigh sat beside me on the ledge. "I know how hard it is to lose a captain. It breaks you. I've seen how it impacts their kids before, and your reaction may not be out of the ordinary. Losing a brother or a parent let alone both in one day is a nightmare. My friend had been executed, and now his rival was brutally murdered. It's a lot to take in."

"Who killed him? How did my dad die?" I interrogated.

"That's hard to say, Kid." My eyes finally moved towards him with a blank yet broken look of defeat. "Blackbeard could have actually had the final blow. Or maybe it was blood loss or his illness. Maybe it was from Akainu scorching his insides. It could have been anything. Yet in the end..." he paused, "your pops died standing up." I was left speechless at the news. "He was an incredible man, and his era will never...ever...be forgotten by the world."

"I wish he was still here," I quietly confessed. Rayleigh smiled as I averted my eyes from him.

"So do your brothers." I perked up at the statement.

"My brothers?"

"I figured you were worried about them. Marco and the others are safe, Kid." That brought me so much relief, that another session of tears began, and that left me to become vulnerable in front of the old man. "Let it all out. You'll feel better."

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