The Mob Boss Wants Forever

Chapter 16: Forbidden

You're doing something you absolutely should not. You're meeting Jungkook. You know that Taehyung will hate that you did this. You know that he won't approve. You know that Taehyung doesn't think you can trust Jungkook. But you're meeting him anyway and Taehyung never has to know.

Jungkook is your friend. He's important to you. Everything has gone crazy, but before they did, Jungkook told you something. He opened his heart to you. He bared his soul. He deserves a response.

But Fuck... I love you and it won't go away.

Jungkook's words knock around inside your head as you sneak out of Taehyung's house under the cover of dark.

It wont go away, Jungkook said and you understand that feeling better than most. Because his words? They wont go away either. Even though everything has changed. Even though you killed a man. Even though there is a bounty on your head... you can't forget Jungkook's words. No matter what you do or what you've been through... Jungkook's words will not go away.

And his emotions? They will not go unanswered. They cannot. Jungkook is your friend so you have to respond. You have to say something. What you'll say? No ideas.

"Is that really a surprise? That I love you?" Jungkook asked you.

You've been asking that of yourself, flashing back to when you were younger. Did you miss the signs of his infatuation? Did you encourage it?

Taehyung knew about Jungkook's feelings, so why didn't you?

Didn't you know? Your treacherous heart asks.

That's the problem with this fool proof sneak out plan. You have no idea what you'll say. You just know that you have to say something, for the sake of your friendship.

But... did I know? All these years and all this time...did I know? The questions haunts you as you leave the bed you share with Taehyung and sneak out under cover of dark to see another man.

But is he that too you? Another man? Or is he your friend Jungkook? A person you love. A person you can trust.

"I love you. I have kept those words to myself for so long. Because of Taehyung. Because of you and because it's messy. But Fuck... I love you and it won't go away."

You're sneaking out the Maserati that you drive as Jungkook's confession replays in your head. What do you say to that? How do you feel about him?

Then you wonder if you're only confused because you're making yourself confused.

Because what you're sure of? You love Taehyung. You want to be with Taehyung. Forever.

And when forever is on the table you just don't have time for your feelings for Jungkook. Right? There's no time for him. All time must be spent on Taehyung. All love must be spent on him. You can't share it with Jungkook. It's not right.

As you drive toward the Jeon house, you try to imagine how the conversation will go.

"Jungkook...I appreciate your feelings, but I'm in love with Taehyung," you practice in the car. But is that too callous? Too truthful? Not fair? "Jungkook in another life... ugh, fuck."

You hope the the words will come to you when you see him. The right words. You keep checking your mirrors to make sure no one is following you. Jimin made you scared and so you're on constant alert. The last thing you want is to die because you snuck out to meet Jungkook. Usually, you'd have Namjoon with you and another guard but they would tell Taeyhyung where you went and who you met... and what you talked about.