Bloodshed

Chapter Two: Selfish (Gabriel's POV)

I stood on the shore, far away from Audrey and Master, to watch Lucius' boat depart. It had been centuries since we had been apart from one another, and his absence already cut like a knife. Lucius was my oldest friend, my closest confidant. Without him, I felt lost, alone. 

And Audrey's venomous hatred of me would only serve to fester the wound of loneliness settling deep within my chest. 

We hadn't spoken much since I had forced her into the blood exchange. And though her utter disdain of my existence robbed me of breath, I could not bring myself to regret my decision. I may lament deceiving her, for causing Master to return, but I did not regret turning her. Audrey lived, that was all that mattered to me. 

She will forgive you. Master's voice drifted into my head, unbidden. Not now, but eventually.

My decisions were my own, I knew that. But I was angry, so angry at how things were going, and I was desperate for something--someone to direct my anger towards. And Master seemed to be a suitable target. 

Fuck off. I mentally spat. 

Ooh, such venom. He thought back, while still maintaining a normal conversation with Audrey on the dock. Careful, lest one mistake you for that hateful bastard you call father. 

I am nothing like him. I thought in response. 

Master was pushing my buttons, just as he had so many other times in the past. It was a game to him, seeing how far he could coral me before I snapped, though I never could figure out why. 

Did he want to merely test my limits? See what I could tolerate before the flames took over?

Or was it something simpler?

More primal? 

Did he enjoy my anguish, my frustration?

I doubted he would ever provide the answers.

Is that so? Master thought in return. Odd, considering your father was a selfish, manipulative prick. He would do anything to get what he wanted, regardless of casualties--just like you! 

I snorted. I did not want Audrey to die. I saved her! That hardly seems hateful.

But it is selfish, is it not? He volleyed. 

Instead of replying, I growled, low and guttural. If Audrey heard it, she didn't let on. I was thankful for that. She had made it abundantly clear that she did not wish to associate with me, and I was willing to grant her space. 

It was the least I could do.

No, Master's voice filled my head again. The least you could have done was honor my great-granddaughter's final wish. His tone was deadly for a brief moment, shifting to playfully sinister instantly. But I suppose I should be grateful. Because of your selfishness, I am free to walk the earth once more. 

Steam began to roll off me, bringing that too familiar heat to the surface of my skin. Before the flames could take hold, I turned to walk away, both enraged and hopeless. I was at the silver gate I had left open, ready to step over the threshold, when Audrey's voice suddenly rang like a bell in my ears. 

"Gabriel isn't family. He's dead to me."

I shouldn't have been able to hear her, not with her on the dock. Not over the sound of the boat, the churning ocean waters, the whistling winter wind. 

My rage grew to outright fury, and I whipped around to glare at Master. It was one of his many abilities, amplifying and broadcasting the sounds around him. I had watched him use that talent so many times over the centuries...when we hunted together. Nausea washed over me at the memory, causing me to shiver. 

I didn't like to think about my first centuries as a vampire. All the blood I had spilled, all the pain I caused. It made me sick. 

I shook my head, fighting off the bile rising up my throat, and sent out a departing thought to my creator. You are a bastard. 

No, I am a monster. He mentally replied. As are you...As is Audrey, thanks to you. 

I huffed before shooting off toward the square. My chest ached, my body burned, the flames were taking over. With a roar loud enough to shake the ground, I let the fire win, allowed it to turn me into a living torch. 

                                                                                     ~~~

It was dark by the time my flames died. My clothes were gone, replaced by alabaster skin covered in patches of soot. I was exhausted all the way to my soul, or whatever remained of my wretched soul. In recent days I wondered if I even possessed one at all anymore. 

As I trudged into the university, I decided I must have some remnants of a soul. Otherwise, this wouldn't hurt so much. 

I shook my head, unwilling to think anymore. I needed a shower, and sleep. And reminiscing over circumstances I could not change would not serve to aid in either of those things. 

Just as I stepped inside, I felt another presence, and a curse escaped me. "I thought you would be sleeping by now."

Lincoln stepped from around a pillar in the lobby, arms crossed over his chest. "Shit, and I thought you done went and burnt yourself to death today. What the hell was that about, man?"

I rolled my eyes, turning toward the corridor on my right. "That is none of your concern."

"Nah, bullshit." I could hear his footfalls behind me, much to my dismay. "It is my concern if you pull shit like that. Ya know why? 'Cause like it or not, I need you. And so does Aud. And ya ain't no good to us dead." 

My steps faltered a moment at the mention of Audrey, but it was so brief that Lincoln didn't seem to notice. 

"If it's information you seek, you could just as well seek out Lucius when he returns." I spoke over my shoulder. "He has known Master for as long as I have."

Lincoln let out a groan behind me. "Yeah, but he ain't hunt with him like you did. You know his powers, how he uses them, his MO." 

I had reached a set of stairs at the end of the corridor, one that the university students hadn't had access to, and I began to ascend them. Unsurprisingly, Lincoln followed, waiting on me to respond. 

"I have already told you what I know of those days." I sighed, struggling to keep my eyes open. "I have nothing more to offer." 

It wasn't true. There was so much more to my past with Master, so much pain and violence that I hadn't ever dared utter to another living being. Not even Duke, with his mind reading ability, knew of what I had endured during my vampiric infancy with Master. I guarded it so well, that not even I could access it without something triggering the memory. 

Lincoln let out a sigh of his own. "Fine. Maybe I just wanna keep you around to punish you for turning Aud."

That stopped me dead. 

Turning on the balls of my feet, I faced the half-breed, eyeing him dubiously. After a moment, I let out a humorless chuckle, and shook my head. "You do not want to punish me."

He cocked a black brow. "I don't?"

"No." I shook my head, turning around to continue the trek upstairs. "Your hatred of me and my kind is outweighed by the love you have for Audrey. You are grateful that I turned her." 

Now it was his turn to stop. I didn't bother looking back, nor did I halt. Instead, I listened as he spoke in a weakly skeptical voice. "Oh yeah? What makes ya so sure about that?"

"Because you are a selfish monster." I mumbled, adding. "Just like me." 

A/N*

Sorry for the late update, and the short chapter. I've been taking a bit of an impromptu mental health break. But I'm back, and ready to get some chapters out. 

Love you guys bunches! Happy reading ❤