The Rockmore House

2 | Futile Odds

A few days later, I was already breaking the rules again. But it was a harmless minor infraction, I told myself, as I thumbed through the racks of women's dresses at a thrift shop. It wasn't like I was at a friend's house, or say, visiting another decade.

My dad left me a very detailed list of things he needed me to pick up at the auto parts shop, and because he hadn't specified which auto parts shop, I drove to the one the next town over and made a quick side trip to the Goodwill next door. If my dad was tracking me on his phone, the little dot marking my location would blink close enough to the auto parts store to keep me out of trouble.

I had a set of vintage sheets with a cheerful pink, yellow and apple green floral print draped over my arm. The colors ignited a little spark of joy in me and I thought maybe I could make something with them if I could figure out that sewing machine. A sixties or seventies looking dress with an autumnal floral print with orange and mustard yellow blooms and brown leaves and billowy sleeves also caught my eye. I had no use for vintage dresses anymore, but it was too pretty to leave behind. It was practically begging me to help it escape from its thrift store purgatory, surrounded by all those pilled, stretched out sweaters and scratchy, boring office appropriate shirts that would best be described as blouses. And it was five dollars.

As I checked out, I got a text from my friend Kaitlin, Can you come over? I'm not okay

I asked what was wrong. She hadn't been at school that day, and I assumed she was sick.

Kaitlin: Chloe dumped me

Vanessa: Oh crap, Kait. I'm so sorry

I texted my dad to ask if I could go to Kaitlin's but he wouldn't back down. I even used her broken heart to try to convince him but he responded, No dice.

Vanessa: Can you come to my house? My dad is heartless

Kaitlin was a hopeless romantic and she'd been with Chloe for over a year. She was probably an absolutely devastated wreck. Chloe left for college in August and they were planning to visit each other every other weekend until Kaitlin joined her at Michigan State after graduation. I hoped Kaitlin wanted to vent and rage, because if she wanted hugs and comforting platitudes I feared I was not the right friend for that.

When I got home, Kaitlin's red Corolla was parked haphazardly in the driveway and she was sitting in a rocking chair on the porch in her pajamas and fuzzy slippers.

"Make yourself at home," I announced with a sweeping arm gesture.

She snorted. Strands of blonde hair had escaped the messy bun on the top of her head and clung to her puffy, wet face. Her sea green plastic glasses accentuated the redness around her eyes. She drew her legs to her chest and rested her chin on her knees. She was such a radiant person with a huge heart, but right then she looked so small.

"I'm so sorry, Kait."

"Three weeks," she said before sniffling and wiping her nose with the back of her hand. "Three weeks at State and I'm toast. I feel so stupid. And now there's no way I can go there."

"It's a huge school. You'd probably never see her."

"But knowing I could at any time, I don't think I could stand it. What am I gonna do?" She wailed and started crying into her hands. I sat on the floor next to her and awkwardly patted her foot. I was very bad at this.

"Maybe she couldn't handle missing you so much," I offered unhelpfully.

"She should be used to it! She lived in another town! We only saw each other on weekends for our entire relationship! State is only an hour and a half away, it's not like she's on the other side of the world." She scoffed. "It's not because she misses me, it's because I was only good enough until there were better options. Like fifty-thousand better options."