History Doesn't Repeat Itself

Chapter 26

I continue to stare at the shiny night sky while I imagine what was about to happen. Lev was outside the front door, and my mom looked like she was waiting for him to knock.

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Thus the godlike senses of smell that we have. The fresh lavender scent started to get stronger, and then I hear it. The light knocks on the door. I smelled desperation mixed with sweat and tears.

It wasn't as bad as I expected, but It was still bad that Lev was like this because of me. Me.

With a sigh of relief, I continue staring into the night sky while I hear my mother opens the door and get met with a burst of 1-year-old Lavender perfume.

"Holy shit." I hear mom say through the, now quiet, music that was playing through my headphones.

I hear Lev whispering something. "Is she here?"

My mom doesn't say anything, but I feel like she nodded, and then she hugged Lev.

Then I hear crying again. Now the music that was previously quiet, was loud. Very loud. Loud enough to muffle the conversation that my mother and Lev were having.

But I was still to make out Lev saying sorry a bunch of times.

After a while, I feel a certain shift in the room. I lift my head up and I check the loading bar that I had waited 3 hours on. It was at 99%. But that didn't excite me, Lev did.

I move my gaze towards him who was propped up on the doorjamb. Still his strong-necked, strong-jawed, very tall self, with the same sweatpants and shirt he had on last night.

His different-colored eyes were staring deep into mine and his mouth was forming a hard line. He was sad, and I can smell just how sad he is.

I part my lips, wanting to say something, but I didn't. I wanted to see what he was going to do. If I had made the right decision to wait for him to come for me instead of me coming to him.

He lets out a sigh filled with pain. I see half of his mouth trying to smile, but that smile falls instantly when a lonely teardrop falls from his blue eye.

I was sitting on the bed now. My headphones still sitting on my ears. No music was playing now.

A beat passes, and Lev took a step forward now. And he looked like he was using all of his strength to walk toward me.

As a reply, I scooched to the end of the bed, while I eyed the space next to me, wanting him to sit next to me.

He doesn't talk when he sat down nor didn't turn his head. He instead leaned his face onto my shoulder, letting tears out while he silently sobbed. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

"I'm sorry, Christy. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It was all my fault and I'm sorry." He whispered again, placing the back of his hand on my thigh. "I'm sorry for everything."

I silently regard him. His warmth that has spread throughout the whole room and the moisture that was coming out of his eyes. And I felt sorry that he had to endure this much pain.

"I love you. I'm sorry, and I love you, Christy." He whispers. "Don't leave me. Please." He was moving and rubbing my thigh with the back of his hand now. "Everything is my fault. It always is."

And just like that. I snap.

"Shut up, Lev," I say, parting his head from my shoulder.

"No, Christy." He says. His voice was cracking. "No, please. No."

He was kissing my hair now, and I feel his warm lips on the crown of my head. I loved him. But I want him to learn that what he did wasn't his fault.