LOVE AT THE FORUM

Chapter 30: Feel Good

AN: It's just gets sad from here. Just a warning.

Harry was quiet the entire way home, not turning to look at me. Still his hand held mine the entire time. I could feel the tension radiating in his fingers. Anita had taken the day off to watch the show and had texted me expressing how different Harry was on stage than usual.

When we got to his house, we entered and he kissed my forehead softly, leaving without a word to get into the shower. I bit my lip as nerves filled my body, heading into his room to change.

Once in his room I realized I hadn't brought a change of clothes and just took off my work bodysuit, throwing on a random shirt I found in his drawer. I just wanted to feel comfortable at the hospital.

I made my way out to the living room and waited for him on the couch, my knees bent towards my chest, texting my sister we would be on our way soon to switch. I was grateful the hospital understood my work schedule and would make exceptions for us when it came to switching past visiting hours.

I heard Harry turn off the shower and soon he was out, his hair a wet mess, a loose black shirt and some black joggers sitting perfectly on his body. He sat on the couch near my feet, he placed his hand on them, running his thumb along my toes.

I analyzed his face, noticing the strain on his face. My eyes fell to his nose, small bits of white powder lingered on one nostril. I sighed, biting my lip, pushing myself up to sit on my knees, wiping it off his nose. I kissed his cheek softly before heading to the kitchen to grab myself some water.

He came in shortly after, standing in front of me, placing his hands on my waist, "Please don't be upset. I needed something to make me feel good."

"I don't want you coming with me under any influence Harry."

"Baby, I'm not even high. I just needed a pick me up."

I searched his eyes, his pupils slightly larger than usual, "Harry, that pick me up is you being high. I don't want that around my mom. I'm not here to tell you what to do or not do, but I can tell you that you won't be coming with me tonight."

I pushed this hand off my waist, finishing my water and turning to find my purse, "Baby, please wait." He said, grabbing my wrist, "I leave tomorrow night, I don't want to not see you."

"So then you should have told me what was going through your head instead of choosing to do that." I freed my arm from his grip and grabbed my things.

He ran up quickly and wrapped his arms around my waist, burying his face in my hair, "Baby, please," his voice breaking, "they made me say I love her. I hated every moment of it. I hate that you have to read that. I hate what would happen if the paparazzi got a picture of us, how they would make you sound. What they would turn our relationship into, the more I love you the more this becomes so hard."

I sighed deeply, placing my arm over his, "I'm sorry honey. I don't like any of this either. I'm sorry you are being forced to do this. I feel like I added to the stress of this. If I wasn't a thing, it wouldn't be this messy."

"But I don't want that. You've added so much more to my life Maggie. I just felt overwhelmed, and I didn't want to put that extra stress on you. So I did what I thought would make me feel good, even if only temporarily."

I turned to face him, placing my hands on his face, "Never again, okay? If you are seeing my mom or sister, never again. I'm not here to tell you to not do certain things, I'm not controlling in that way. You're a grown man, and I know it's not a problem you have, or I wouldn't be standing here. Okay?"

He nodded, sadness in his eyes, "I promise."

I nodded and leaned up to kiss him, "Where are your keys? I'm driving."