Poetry Collection

Dedication

My house is unstable and about to burst.
It was stable once, but you were here then.
You gave me, but I didn't deem myself worthy.
I couldn't give you back, though I tried everything.

I still would, for your sake.
Nothing will sever the cord, I'd cross all lines.
The forces of this house tore you apart.
I'd tear myself apart, if it would help you.
Willing to give you the world, instead here you were.
I lacked the world, but you still covered me.

Why was it so, that my efforts never weighed?
Nothing was too extreme, I'd never hurt your words.
Through all of my efforts, I tore them apart.

I took your hand, pulled you from the ground.
I built these walls, to represent your protection.
You could barely breathe, but it was for the best.
In the end, I've made you run a storm.
Run from me, the one that would rather die.

Without you, in this solitude.
The walls are full of memories and words.
These words stuck to the wall, cause I couldn't bring them to life.
Now that you're gone, these walls have nothing to breathe on.
It's my fault, for loving you with all my heart.

These walls, will soon collapse.
The roof will fall down.
It will all crash upon me.
I'm just not sure, if it'll be my death.

When I was a teen I didn't have any friends and when I did get to know people in a positive way, it could become really intense. Because I had expectations of the friendships I so longed for. People have always been scared of my enthusiasm in any way and it made me feel like my positivity became negative once it came out. I felt like it would be too painful for anybody to be my friend.