With Or Without You

4.

Karan's POV:

Shit. I don't know what the fuck just happened but I feel like I just made things ten times worse.

Idiot. Why couldn't I just keep my mouth shut? Why did I have to go on spouting bullshit I didn't even mean? Why did I have to act like the dumbest asshole on planet earth?

It's not like we'll have to see each other while I'm here

It's not like I don't not want to see her. I admit, it's not the most ideal vacation but it's definitely not the worst situation I had been or ever could be in either.

I would be lying if I said I hadn't thought about her at all in the past two years because I had. Not entirely romantically but I did always wonder how she was. The paparazzi, the articles, the interviews always made her come off as someone who's been living her life to the fullest. Someone who's on the right path to achieving success. Someone who's got it all figured out. I'm not saying it's a lie but I'm not saying it's completely true either. There's a lot more to a person than what meets the eye even if said person is a celebrity. Believe me, I should know.

After so many years in the industry, it doesn't take rocket science to understand how it works. The press is messed up. It's all projection. One minute they want to build you up–and they're only too game to call you 'number one' or the 'trp king/queen' and the next second they want to bring you down.

That's what I figured out after my first show. They had me at all these events and interviews and stuff, wanted me to be a star. It's all unsustainable. After I broke up with my girlfriend and she put up a cryptic message saying I basically cheated on her, my team told me that doing the publicity would be good for me. Like I'd own the story; it would be my message, or something like that. But I didn't want to be the golden boy and then wait for them to come after me to tear it down. Besides, I respected my ex too much to even imply anything against her. A star doesn't mean that you're above other people which gives you the right to say anything. If you have the stage and the power you should use it productively.

I know Tejasswi too well to know that she's not the kind of person that falls prey to all of that jazz. But I still worried. I do worry.

My thoughts are interrupted by the loud, booming voice of Advik.

"Dude, we've been waiting for you since forever. We thought you'd come soon but when you didn't we just thought you went to sleep so we saw a movie instead."

I muttered a small okay, not really paying attention to what he was saying.

He definitely noticed, "What's going on?"

I quickly put on a smile, "Nothing."

He paused, "You sure?"

"Absolutely," I say, forcing a smile. "Let's go and hit the beach."

He finally lets it go, shaking his head and we go downstairs.

I don't know for how long I can keep lying. Sure, Advik didn't know Teja since she was already out of my life when he came in but still. I feel wrong doing this. I feel like I'm betraying our friendship in some way.

Not much I can do about it though. At least not right away.

I'm trying to let loose and forget when I see her again.

God fucking dammit.

I thought this was supposed to be easy. This hotel has hundreds of rooms and dozens of activities one can engage themselves in and yet she has to be right where I am at the same time? Is God conspiring against me too?

She's in her bikini with her sunglasses on top of her head resting on a chair.

I know we're not supposed to talk much less look at each other but I find myself wanting to do so. I'm not exactly sure how or why but I felt that she might be a little hurt because of what I said.

She sure as shit didn't show it but I don't need her to wear her heart on her sleeve for me to figure out exactly what's bothering her. And she was bothered by it. I could tell in the way her breathing got deeper and her voice got tighter.

I was about to make my way towards her when I was stopped by Hiya.

She gave me a side hug, "Where have you been? I've been looking for you all over."

"Sorry I was tired, so I went to sleep for a while."

"Well now that you're here, let's go sightseeing!"

"But we just got to the beach." I protested.

She pouted her lips and gave me her puppy dog eyes. I roll my eyes at her but eventually give in. Hiya always gets what she wants one way or another. No point trying to resist. Sooner or later everyone's doing exactly what she wants.

She squeals, "Yayyy I'll get Advik. Meet us at the front in 5."

I head back to my room and freshen up the best I can, washing my face and changing my clothes in the process. I grab my phone and head out.

When I reach outside they're already there and it seems like they booked a bus because it is all ready to take us out. I furrowed my brows in confusion. Why would we need a bus? There were only three of us. I groan, what did this girl do now?

"Surprise!" Hiya exclaims. "So I was at the reception and I found this amazing four day driving tour. They take you to the best places in Hawaii and they have a tour guide to explain the history and just help you connect with the place."

"Four days?" I grunt with irritation.

I see her smile waver before she fixes it, "It's only four days and look on the bright side, it's an amazing experience. I thought you loved learning about the history of landmarks and all. Besides, there's only one more group joining us for this. It won't be too crowded and yet we'll have company to keep ourselves entertained."

No wonder Hiya had every guy I know eating out of the palm of her hand. This girl was impossible to say no to.

"Fine, screw it. Let's do this."

She lets out a whoop of joy and takes both Advik and me in for a hug. I had a huge smile on my face despite myself. It could be fun. Plus, it might get my mind off all the Teja drama.

"So, who's this other group who's joining us?"

"They must be coming right about now."

I turn my gaze towards my back and...

Oh hell no.