She's A Goddess

chapter 37

Your pov

I woke up to Rose's arm around my waist. I smiled at the woman in my arms as she slept. She retracted her hand and started mumbling something. Her lip started to quiver.

"Please don't leave me. I can't live with out you"

My heart shattered. I started to stroke her hair and whisper sweet nothings into her ear helping her calm down. A few minutes later she wakes and looks up at me.

"Good morning love"

"Morning"

"How'd you sleep?"

"It was ok"

"I love you flower"

"I love you more"

"And I love you most" jack added

I giggled at his comment then kissed his head. He burried his head into me more if that was even possible. A nurse walked in and asked him to get off for a minute. He reluctantly did but still held my arm.

The nurse checked my vitals the left the room. After much persuading they let me leave if Rose promised to watch me closely. She said she wouldn't let me out of her sight.

She walked me out of the hospital with me carrying Jack. She helped me get in the car then she did the same.

"Are you going to baby me?"

"Yes I will"

I giggled at her response and lay my hand on her thigh.

"Okay"

She drives us home and refuses to leave my side. Like I don't mind but she was serious. While I was helping make dinner she gripped my arm too tight making me yelp out in pain.

"I-"

"Hey look at me Rose"

She kept her eyes glued to the floor. I take her hand that she retracted into mine and place it on my arm. She lightly grips it and finally looks up at me teary eyed.

"Hey you didn't mean it. It's okay that it hurt, I know that you don't mean to hurt me. You are the most caring and gentle woman in the world. The pain just shows I'm healing. I love you so much Rose"

"I love you more"

We finish making dinner then clean up. After dishes are done I start to go upstairs.

"Where are you going" Rose asks

"To shower"

"Okay"

I start running my shower when I reach our bathroom. As I'm tugging my shirt off I see my arms littered with scars. I sat with my back against the cold tub frame.

I don't know how long I sat there for but I was there for a while. I left the shower running as I traced my arm. I heard footsteps coming closer to the door yet I didn't move. A soft knock was heard then the door opened.

"Baby you've been in here for a while"

"I'm down here"

She looks at me her expression saddening. She crouched down to my level. I hesitately looked into her chocolaty eyes. She gave me a small kiss on the head before she sat next to me.

"What happened"

"I can't do it" I mumble

"Do what" she asked

"Look at myself"

"Oh"

"Yeah" I reply resting my head on her shoulder.

We sit in silence before our son runs in. Rose goes to tuck him into bed then comes back to me.

"Can you help me?" I whisper

"Of course I can"

She undresses herself then reaches for my hand. I take hers in mine knowing we'll go slow. She lead me into the shower and just held me while whispering praises in my ear.

"Can I wash you baby?"

I nod as an answer. She takes the cool soap in her hand and starts to wash my body taking extra care on my arms. Once the water gets uncomfortable we get out. She dries me off and I get dressed in boyshorts and a bra.

Once she was dry we both got in bed. She was careful but snuggled up to my side. I lay there holding her in my arms staring at the black abyss above me.

"Hey y/n/n?"

"Yeah Rose?

"You're my light y/n. Please don't let the light go away. It broke my heart when I saw you pass out just like when you got shot. It was sickening to go back there and see you like that again. The first time I saw you in that bed I felt my heart shatter. And the second time I told Debbie I could do it and when we walked in I absolutely broke. So please just please don't let the light go away. Please y/n"

"Baby I'm so fucking sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't know what I was thinking when I was panicking. The light will be here to stay I promise. I don't plan on going back to that god forsaken place unless I absolutely need to. I love you so much my flower. I'm not leaving you until the end of time it self. Never ever will I do that again."

She gave me a nod and my grip gets tighter. I winced once and she tried to move away but I wouldn't let her. She complained that she would hurt me but I needed cuddles and I know she needed cuddles too. At some point she fell asleep and me moments after her.