Neighbours, Friends, Lovers

12. "Campione nato"

꧁ Charlotte's Pov ꧂

Here we are, standing inside the box while the engines are getting started, the tires covered by the tires warmers, pilots taking their places where they will be let all by themselves in a bath of sweat, adrenaline and pressure for the entire race.

Anxiety is running though my entire body breathing this new air that only at F1 races you can breathe, I don't know what it is and its hard to describe, it's almost pressure, adrenaline, anxiety and fear, yeah FEAR. I won't lie, I like see him racing but I get scared at the same time because like in every sport just a little thing can change the race like an engine that it's too consummated, like a kick in the wrongplace for a footballer, a wrong movement for a basket player or like something slippery in the wrong place for a MotoGP rider.

I've learned by watching F1 through the year that there are million reasons or factor that can make a race go wrong and after Grosjean accident last year my fear of something going bad take place in my chest every freaking race.

Charles loves this sport and he is so good at it so I guess is worth the risk and so it's with every my little heart attack every time I watch him race.

I look at him sit inside his car, waiting for the pit lane opening and I ask myself how they handle all this pressure watching the crowd getting more excited by the starting time getting closer and closer by the minutes passing by, the sky gets darker and darker and the lights are illuminating the track.

The noice of engines, mechanics and fans are almost so overwhelming that I can't understand how he can deal with all this without a pair of headphones like Lewis or Daniel do, my anxiety  will never let me handle all this without some distractions like some music blasting in my ears.

I know that most of the people will not understand what I'm complaining about since he is highly paid, he gets to be 1 of the 21 pilots of the entire world and he is not driving a shitty car but the one and only Ferrari F1-75, he has the best fans of the entire F1 world and he has a wealthy life in Monaco..... but not everything that sparkles is gold, at least Italians says like this and they mean to say that even if their lives seem a dream it's not really like that because with all this comes the pressure from media, the lack of privacy, the fear of going out, to being yourself in a public area, fear of loved ones being chased by strangers and so much more.

I don't know how he does it but his passion is so strong that he seems to not be bothered by anything or anyone.

▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄ Charles Pov ▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀

I've missed all this caos. Engines, mechanics voices that are talking with a vocabulary that just us can understand, fans in the stands that screams when they see a pilot in the maxi screen.
I'm at home.
I've missed the pressure, the adrenaline the race days.

I've missed the feeling of the helmet and suit wrapping my body so well, the lights of my steering wheel.

"Dai Charles, concentrato come sempre e fai quello che sai fare meglio." Mattia tells me trying to hype me up.
"Certo Mattia!" I say even knowing that he can't hear me then I show him a thumbs up, he taps me on my helmet and goes to Carlos side.

I try to look at my friends by stay sit in my car all buckled up, looking from the side mirrors and I see them.
They are looking around, following the moves of the many mechanics and engineers.
My eyes falls on Charlotte that really got me speechless yesterday by showing up on the stairs of my motorhome.
I can't lie to myself. I got excited when I saw her. I've missed her and honestly I never thought she would've come here.
I know that she likes spending time with me and it's the same for me because I get to be 100 % me when I'm with her but I know that since the Gaia's thing she pulled the brakes, because she was her best friend and also she doesn't wants attention. She is the only monegasque girl that I know that doesn't like to be in the spotlight so she doesn't want to be seen with me. I know it's crazy, many girls would pay to get paparazzed with me but she avoids me like I'm her worst nightmare.
If I'm honest, I'll not be bothered by getting paparazzed with her even if I know the many consequences that I'll be having but I have to be respecting her boundaries, her privacy as a person that loves her as a friend and wants to protect her from any hate and the pubblic eye.