Follow Me Home

☁️ chapter three ☁️

"It's not as bad as it looks," Louis immediately said, trying hard not to worry Harry.

He was fine. Just fine.

"Sweetheart..." Harry sighed, crouching down in front of him.

Louis looked away, not feeling like he was able to meet his eyes. He felt too much shame and guilt.

"Please tell me baby, what's wrong?" Harry asked him. "How did this happen honey?"

Louis had already come up with a response, and as pathetic as he felt, he decided it was better than telling Harry the truth. "Honestly, I've been having some bad vertigo, apparently it's from all the traveling. Especially since I just got to the US." He explained.

Harry sighed, helping Louis up, and keeping him steady. "I know vertigo is common babe, but you've never had it before.. and even if you had this seems worse than vertigo."

"Harry I promise.. that's all it is. You don't have to worry about me. I'm sorry I scared you with that fall... I'm just really dizzy." He was slurring a little again and was trying with all his might to sound clear.

Harry ran a hand through his hair. "Listen, if this happens another time you're seeing the doctor again. Got it?"

Louis nodded feebly, "got it."

"Good, now let's go get you freshened up and in some new pants. I talked to your manager and we're rescheduling the show." Harry said, holding him steady as they walked slowly back to the backstage area.

Louis' face fell immediately, "No. No, we can't reschedule, the show is halfway finished anyway."

"Louis the fans and security guards are all really worried right now, and it will be best for you and for them if you push it back." Harry said gently, as they walked into the dressing room where Louis' sweatpants were waiting. He always changed the second the shows ended, it was just part of his routine and he loved comfortable clothes.

Harry helped him balance while he put his sweatpants on, being so worried the whole time. This had to be more than just vertigo right? But what else could it be anyway?

Harry was so lost in all his worried thoughts that he hardly even realized when Louis finished getting the sweatpants on and kissed his cheek. "You in there H?" He asked, grinning a little.

"Hm? Oh yeah, sorry. Just thinking," Harry said, taking Louis by surprise and scooping him up into his arms.

Louis laid his head on Harry's chest, and listened to the steady beating of his heart as he was carried back to the tour bus to rest.

"How long are you gonna stay Hazzie?" He asked, looking up at him.

"I'm flying back to LA tomorrow. They're on a tight schedule with filming," Harry explained.

Louis nodded, "I'll miss you... thanks for coming tonight."

"Of course Lou," Harry kissed his head. "I just wish I could stay longer... I need you to take care of yourself okay?"

Louis nodded as Harry gently laid him in his bunk and then climbed right in beside him. "Tonight though, you have me to take care of you."

•

Harry woke up around 3 am with a headache. He tried to go back to sleep, but it was just one of those headaches that would only go away with medicine.

Quietly, he untangled himself from Louis, making sure not to wake him. He knew Louis carried aspirin in his duffle, because he always liked to have some on hand. He carefully pulled Louis' duffel bag down from the storage above the bunks, and miraculously, he didn't wake a single person.

He started rifling through the bag, but froze when he came across a small book. Louis hated reading so Harry had no idea what it could be, so naturally, feeling curious, he hovered over the cover with his phone flashlight.

Living with ALS: the complete guide.

Forgetting about the aspirin, Harry grabbed the book, and shoved the bag back up to the storage compartment. His hands shook nervously as he carried the book to the small bathroom.

He softly closed the door behind him, then turned on the light. He sat down on the closed toilet lid and stared at the book for several minutes, thoughts racing through his head. Eventually he brought himself to open it, and saw that Louis had been highlighting and circling things all through the pages, writing notes in the margins, notes about symptoms he'd been having and how frequently they were appearing.

Harry's eyes welled up with tears. He'd known this was more than just vertigo. "Holy fuck..." he whispered under his breath. Once the initial shock passed, the real sobs started. He held a fist over his mouth to muffle them.

After a solid half hour or so, Harry felt calm enough to head back out to the bunks. He was startled a bit however, when he saw Louis, laying there wide awake "Woke up without you, where'd you go? I wanted my Harry snuggles." Louis said, yawning cutely.

Normally, Harry would melt at that, but right now he only had one thing on his mind. "Why didn't you tell me?" He asked, his voice breaking.

Louis sat up a little, "Why didn't I tell you what?"

"C'mon Louis you know what I'm talking about." Harry said, tossing the book onto the bed.

"Shit..." Louis sighed, "I just wanted to protect you."

"Protect me? Protect me from what Louis? From the truth?" Harry asked, "Because I know, sometimes the truth hurts.... but lying does too."

"I know... I'm sorry... I just didn't want you to worry Haz." Louis said quietly, looking ashamed.

Harry was quiet for a minute before asking, "How long have you known?"

"Harry please...."

"No. Louis, how long have you known?" Harry asked again.

"About a month." Louis whispered, looking down at his lap.

"Oh Lou..." Harry's voice cracked as he started to cry again. "You've been dealing with this, alone, for a month?"

Louis nodded pitifully. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you Harry."

"No honey..." he sighed heavily, "it's okay. I'm sorry you've been handling this on your own, does anyone know?" Harry asked.

Louis shook his head, "only my doctor."

Harry's heart was in pieces as he pictured Louis at the doctors appointments all on his own, having all sorts of testing while by himself, and worst of all, being given the life changing diagnosis while he was completely alone.

"Oh baby... you're not alone in this anymore okay? I'm gonna be right by your side, always." Harry told him, getting back into the bunk.

Louis just nodded, he knew he couldn't get a word out without sobbing so he didn't even try.

And somewhere between all the cuddles and tears, the couple managed to fall asleep once more, knowing that when they woke, everything would be different.

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