Stellar Evolution/credits to "orphan_account?" on ao3

part 4

Tsukasa.

He didn't even recognize his own name, at first. He could hear muffled noises, but they were difficult to comprehend. Everything was a blur, and his senses weren't the greatest. Tsukasa tried to focus on improving his vision.

Tsukasa, please...wake up.

Was it crying? Maybe he could cheer up the person the voice was coming from when he came to. He wasn't sure what they could possibly be upset about, though. His vision is still blurry, but he can start to see something coming into view in front of him. It sort of resembles a person. He can see widened eyes, staring directly into his, and lavender hair.

Rui.

Tsukasa sits up, causing his entire body to ache. He doesn't remember why. Immediately, Rui's arms are thrown around him in an embrace. He can feel Rui's tears seeping through his shirt. Tsukasa was confused—he'd never seen Rui this legitimately upset. It was strange—this person who was familiar to him as eccentric, mischievous, and intelligent, was now crying on his shoulder and holding him so close he was unsure he could breathe. It was new to him, a side of the director he didn't know about. Maybe Rui cared about him more than he'd thought.

And he'd be just fine with that.

"Please don't scare me like that ever again," Rui finally says, shakily. Tsukasa sits there, without words. He doesn't know how to provide proper reassurance. But, he simply nods in understanding and affectionately runs his hand through Rui's hair.

Looking over his shoulder, he can see that they're at the Wonder Stage. That was strange. The last he remembered, he was in the Wonderland SEKAI with his troupe, performing. Until—

Until that happened. The burning, aching pain in his chest. The sharp ringing in his ears. He felt like he was going to die. His hand twitched a bit uncomfortably thinking about it. The things he saw and heard in his last moments of consciousness while in the Wonderland SEKAI were probably what scared him the most—the screams of his friends and the Virtual Singers, the cracks in the ceiling as the entire stage started to quake and fall apart. What happened to them? He wanted to know why—why the SEKAI was destroyed. Why he felt that pain before passing out. That had never happened before. It didn't feel realistic to him. And he had endless questions about that twisted version of the Wonderland SEKAI. But he desperately prayed that the last part was just a nightmare.

Sitting here like this, with Rui right by him—felt so stupid. Tsukasa felt comforted, but he thought it was stupid that he should need it. He couldn't let things like this disrupt him, and he shouldn't need to be consoled like this. Like some child.

But maybe that's really what he was, a child. An idiotic child, trying to live out the foolish dreams he'd created for himself.

The two boys sit together near the Wonder Stage for about an hour and a half. Rui had calmed down and was now sitting next to Tsukasa on the ground, with their hands intertwined. They hadn't spoken for the entire time they sat there together. It wasn't necessarily uncomfortable silence. There just weren't any appropriate words for the moment.

"So," Tsukasa says, sighing. "What happened in SEKAI? After I passed out."

Rui glances at him for a moment and then responds, "I don't know. As soon as you went unconscious, we were kicked out of SEKAI too. It was odd. But I ended up here after we were forced out of SEKAI, and I didn't see anyone near me when I woke up. So, I went to look for you first."

"Why me first?" Tsukasa asks.

"Heh," Rui laughs, looking at the ground. "Take a guess."

Tsukasa didn't respond. He didn't want to have that conversation right now.

"Did you ever find Emu or Nene?" He asks. Rui shakes his head. Tsukasa sighs irritatedly in response. "Well, should we look for them?"

"I doubt they're still here," Rui says. "Nene messaged me about the situation earlier, and she went home after that. I'm not sure how Emu's doing, but her family would probably start getting worried if she was out too late."

"Well, why'd you stay?! You need rest too, Mr. Director," Tsukasa comments, crossing his arms. Rui stifles a laugh.

"I wanted to make sure you were okay. I can't just leave our star unconscious in the middle of Phoenix Wonderland, you know," Rui replies. "Speaking of the time—we should get going soon. We have school in the morning. ...Are you sure you're going to be alright, Tsukasa?"

It takes a second for Tsukasa to realize Rui's looking at him, expectantly, for an answer. "Oh, uh—yeah, I'll be fine. Saki should be home by now, I think."

Rui looks away from him and gets to his feet. "Alright. Call me if anything happens, ok?" He requests. Tsukasa nods and stands up beside him. The two walk towards the Phoenix Wonderland gates together and then part ways, heading to their houses.

The streets were so dark at night. Tsukasa had considered turning on his phone flashlight, but he ceased as soon as he recognized streetlights in the distance. He still felt significant unease, especially after what had happened today. He didn't receive answers to any of his questions either. Yet, he continued walking, trying to find the way to his home.

Upon reaching his house, Tsukasa knocks on the door and then unlocks it. It's remarkably dark inside, just as it was outside. Tsukasa guessed that Saki was asleep already. He closed the door behind him and turned on his phone flashlight to see. He climbs up the stairs to his room and enters. The star LEDs are still on and the curtains are still shut from earlier. Tsukasa switches on the LEDs and turns off his phone, sitting down on his bed.

He didn't want to remember anything that had happened. He wanted to slip away from the entire world, just for a moment. Just to gather his thoughts. Everything felt so wrong.

But what was it?

He'd searched his entire mind for any recollection of something that could've been the cause of this. But he found nothing. He couldn't find a single reason why his mind was being so weird, why his body ached, why he had done all of this.

Tsukasa didn't know.

There was nothing wrong.

And so he would convince himself that. He would repeat that nothing was wrong in his mind or out loud, until it stuck. There was no other possibility, and he'd just have to accept it. He would hope that today was just some nightmare and that when he woke up, it'd be over. It was just some meaningless delusion, only serving to get in his way to stardom.

He could only hope.