Living With Karen - Blog #1: Jaifei Scammed Me

The Backstory

Tick tock.

Oh, you, incessant little gear. Quiet down! Her hand whipped the ceramic red ladybug alarm clock onto the floor, resulting in a large CRASH! She thought she was in the midst of a much-needed moment of silence until she heard her child Bræydon, wail and scream just as he did whenever she would order him her favorite "Heath Mint Pistachio" ice cream. Karen knew that peppermint oil was going to add shine and definition to her son's growing teeth. She thought he needed to indulge in it so that no one in his class could even attempt to consider that he could be associated with Heather Smith; a pink elastic rubber band and braces-wearing redhead who always stood out to Karen whenever she would drop her son off at school. Karen did not like Heather for a few reasons: 1) Heather's hairstyle was not on par with the Christian Bible, especially with the violet-dyed strands in her hair. 2) Heather loved to chew gum and talk back to the teacher. There was no way that Karen would ever let Bræydon be friends with such an unsophisticated excuse of a schoolgirl.

The sound of her child's wail growing ever so loudly brought her back from her thoughts. Her eyes shot straight to dented alarm clock as its hands read her the time: 4:05 PM. She opened her phone and realized she had spent all morning on TikTok. Speaking of TikTok, she then remembered that she was expecting a delivery of exciting gadgets that would make her life easier to manage. She first encountered these gadgets, merely a week ago, after she viewed a TikTok of a woman attempting multiple times to grab her boyfriend's umbrella so that she could be shielded by the wisp bullets of rain. The woman decides that she has had enough of her boyfriend's antics so she pushes him into the grass and pulls out a purple umbrella hat. Karen had never seen anything like that before in her life. Being mesmerized by the woman's umbrella hat, Karen started to have vivid dreams about meeting the inventor of such a stylish and tactile product. That's when she noticed and clicked on one of the only tagged hashtags in the video's caption: #jiafeiproducts.

After viewing a few dozen videos, Karen found an eCommerce website link to Wish.com, which had these inventive gadgets for sale. She saw that all these gadgets were posted under the same username, @JaifeiProducts. By clicking on the username, Karen then saw the profile and inventor of the gadgets that she was enamored with, that being Jiafei, Owner of JiafeiProducts LLC. Right then and there, Karen knew that this was the perfect opportunity to start her new niche mom blog, Living with Karen, in which she talks about her perilous adventures in parenting a 7-year-old boy in an ever-growing society. Karen felt good about the impact that this could have on her blog. Maybe this will be my big shot? Maybe I'll become famous?! Her blushed cheeks widened with glee at the mere thought of reaching mega-stardom.

Ding dong!

That must be my delivery! Here is my chance at fame! Karen shook her head to regain focus on this very pivotal moment in her life. With a fluttering sigh and optimistic grimace, Karen reached for her cheetah print spectacles, which sat neatly on her mahogany desk workstation, and fixed them onto her face. She parted her pin-straight fried hair to her left, emphasizing her iconic and signature look, Karen's swoop. She was ready to seize the day and possibly change her life for the better. Never mind the shrieks and wallows of her incessant silver statue, this was it! This was her chance, right here and right now, finally at last!

She ran towards the front door, swung it open, grabbed the white USPS parcel package, and struck the door shut. Tearing the package apart, she lifted and unveiled the contents within the box: a 350ml clear glass bottle filled to the brim with an invigorating and clarifying essential oil blend of lavender, sage, and peppermint oil; a yellow-colored rubber gripper with a round suction tip that attaches to the handle of a door; a gag-like facial accessory that claims to cancel noise; a cheetah-print umbrella hat; a small grinder for making carrot purée; and lastly, a personalized rubber chew toy with her son's name engraved on it.