What makes history (Hijikata x OC)

Captain

"The presence of Chizuru-chan already led us to war with the Oni," Sanan calmly stated. "If you go alone, you run to your death."

"I know", I started, my words eliciting a gasp from Kondō.

How I had earned Harada's loyalty still baffled me, but it didn't matter anymore. Squaring my shoulders, I straightened and stated:

" ... this is why I won't go after Kazama".

"What do you intend to do?" the Captain frowned.

I was no longer the Keeper of Time; my life was worth as much as Harada's, or Shinpachi's, or any of the Captains at this point, if not less. There was no reason to put my survival above anyone else, for I did not fulfil a higher purpose anymore.

And even though my mission had been a constant companion for years, I found myself shedding the mantle to fill the little shoes of Frances, girl of the 21st century lost in Kyōto, 19th century. Was I, at last, ready to serve another cause than mine?

It was terrifying; the very idea of tying myself to an organisation, of allowing someone else to rule my life, to surrender my sovereignty, my free will. Yet, it came naturally. I trusted these men. The charred remains of my honour suddenly rekindled, like a phoenix rising from the flames, when reality cleared and my mind found its resolve.

"I will remain here, and serve the Shinsengumi as you have supported me. Die, if need be, to protect your own. My life, is then, yours to command."

And I bowed, head touching my joined hands upon the tatami, as I lay my fate in their hands. Someone stormed in the room in this very moment. Even in my emotional state, I knew who it was; the Demon Commander mastered dramatic entrances like Master Shifu from Kung Fu Panda. I slowly straightened, finding the three men in silent communication. Hijikata shook his head, a silent 'no' to information I probably wasn't supposed to understand. Then, his piercing eyes pinned me into place.

"Are you sure you can obey orders?" he rumbled.

Why did his gaze scramble my brain so much? For a moment, I doubted myself; could I even bring anything of value to the Shinsengumi, aside from rumours and ambushes? But I found resolve, deep in the pit of my stomach. I wasn't the Keeper of Time, but the elvish blade still responded to me; I was a warrior, a good fighter, and a skilled swordswoman and archer. I would help in any way I could.

My throat was too tight, so I nodded. Hijikata's features softened as he sat, and picked up a cup of warm tea for himself. The gesture was so familiar; finger closing upon the ceramic cup, warmth seeping through, the scent of sencha relieving every ache, every doubt. I could almost see myself. It was Kondō-san who broke the silence, and addressed me solemnly.

"Very well. From now on, you will be Harada's second in command for the tenth unit."

"And given his son was just born, he'll be glad that someone else will handle them for the next week," Sanan added with a smile.

What? I started disbelief flooding me. Masa had given birth to a son, and I didn't know about it? Life went on, and I had missed some of it in myself wallowing. This wouldn't do! I would handle Harada's patrols, and make him proud.

"Hai," was my only response.

Serving the Shinsengumi didn't bring much change to me, except for the patrols I had to handle on my own. No pressure, eh? Overall, despite my nerves, the men were used to me watching their backs, and we just covered the usual rounds. One of the guys guided me when I hesitated – none too often – on the directions to take. He and I struck a tentative friendship albeit I just couldn't remember his name. Shame on me...

If some of the soldiers were sour that a gaijin woman would lead them, none protested openly. Perhaps they respected me because they'd seen me fight in the past. Perhaps they just kept their grumbling away from my ears.

Harada had popped up the third day, circles under his eyes, to share a round of drinking with both I and Shinpachi. Once thoroughly wasted, he tugged at my sleeve so insistently that I relented, and followed him back to his house. Given the little amount of blood left in his alcohol, I was glad to be here to ensure his safe return.

His son was a chubby baby, looked after like boiling water by his beaming mother. I fled as soon as I could to avoid the nasty idea blooming in Masa's eyes; she wanted me to hold her bundle of joy. Wasn't I a woman, after all? A Kitsune that came to bless her child? In a fit of inspiration, I kissed the baby's forehead, and sung the only lullaby I knew.

Twinkle twinkle little star.

This seemed to satisfy the new mother. Good. I really didn't want to awaken the baby, and find myself with a screaming swaddle. My hands could sew, dance, release arrows with deadly precision or slice and dice with a sword, but they became clumsy whenever babies were involved. Not that I hated children, I just didn't know what to do with them. At all. But seeing the happy parents smile, the pride that beamed from them both put a little balm to my heart.

Life went on.

And I needed to move on from the loss.