What makes history (Hijikata x OC)

To care for you

A hand shook me awake gently, and I found a set of worried eyes locked with mine. I groaned; Hijikata's eyebrows dipped in a frown.

"I'll clean the wound, you'll show me how to work the rest."

His low rumble washed over me like a benevolent wave, gentle and soothing. The others were gone, and the sun almost set. I blinked the weariness away and winced when Toshizō tried to clear the blood away. It had crusted, and I had to bite my lip to avoid from crying out. Pain irradiated down into my jaw, pulsating like a goddamn pendulum inside my skull.

Toshizō's hands were warm and methodical, his gaze focused, but his breath slightly ragged. In the haze of my pain, I failed at recognising how badly he needed me in this moment. Another soft contact and I hissed in displeasure. Damn, it stung!

"I thought all of you were gone".

The overwhelming admittance caused my eyes to open wide. Then, his voice dropped to a murmur as I caught his eyes. "I thought I had lost you."

I'd never seen him so vulnerable. Chest aching, I grabbed his free hand – it shook – and interlaced our fingers. "I feared for you, too," I breathed. Something unrecognisable flashed in his eyes and I found the courage to smile, careful not to pull upon the split skin of my face. "But we're both here. Just another day in the office, eh?"

Toshizō's lips curled and he squeezed my hand back before grabbing a bottle of something. He dropped a few droplets of liquor onto a clean cloth and set it upon the wound. Fire exploded upon my cheekbone, a whimper escaping as I struggled.

"Damnit," I hissed.

Dark eyes melted with concern, and regret washed over his face when his other hand cradled my uninjured cheek to keep me still. "Sorry, Kitsu. It has to be done."

I merely nodded, releasing – in my mind – a string of curses that would have made a sailor blush. In French. I sought Hijikata's warm touch to try and keep the pain at bay. To think I had some antiseptic wipes in my bag ! Another swipe, and he was done with the alcohol. The sting receded to a throbbing pain, and I eventually managed to inhale properly.

Toshizō dropped a kiss to my lips before he released my cheek, the feeling of his warm breath caused my insides to coil in happiness. For a moment, I could only gaze upon his handsome face, and thank the Valar for both of our lives.

Shuffles coming from the engawa pushed us away as people passed by, and he offered his hand to help me stand.

"Show me how to put those bug bandages."

"Butterfly bandage," I sniggered.

Hijikata nodded, discarding both bowl and rags outside as I fished the strips out of my medical supplies. I sat again in the corner I slept in, and showed Hijikata how to pull both sides of the gash to secure them with steri strips. I had given my suturing glue to Yamazaki, and didn't doubt all of it was gone by now. This would have to do. Careful hands worked upon the gash, placing five different strips at equal distance on the wound. Hijikata worked without haste, so concentrated on his task that he held his breath.

I loved him, him and every feature, every habit. Him and his dedication. Him, and the perpetual scrunched eyebrows. Perhaps now was the best time to tell him – again - since no one was in sight. Just as I was about to open my mouth, he smoothed the last bandage and sighed.

"It will scar. The wound is too deep not to leave a mark."

I was about to tell him not to worry about it when he sighed, resuming his usual seiza position.

"Gomen nasai," he murmured, eyes averted.

I blinked in surprise. "Whatever for?", I asked, testing the solidity of the strips and finding them pretty adequate.