Black alpha

(9)

Pepper suggested that I see Bruce, he might be able to do a blood test and see what I've got going on and what they where injecting me with.

We are back at the tower now I brought my bags up to my room I unlocked the door and Loki was on my bed lighting candles everywhere "Loki?" I said closing the door, he jumped up almost burning himself "gods, you scared me" he got off the bed and grabbed my bags putting them in the wardrobe.

I looked around at my room, there's candle lit on the bedside table and I peaked in the bathroom and he made a bath with rose petals "Loki what is all this?" I smiled in amazement of the room "well I could tell you're having a bad day so I thought I would cheer you up" he looked nervous.

I walked up to him and put my arms around his neck "this is perfect" I kissed his cheek "ok but bathe first or it will get to cold" he said lightly pushing me into the bathroom.

I used my magic to take off both our clothes assuming that he's bathing with me "you want me to join?" he asked standing there as I got in "yeah, you make me feel better" I moved forward so he could go behind me.

Once he sat down and my back was on his chest I relaxed "thank you, Loki" I snuggled my head into his shoulder "you don't need to tell me what's wrong, but if you want to I'm here" he kissed my hair "today is the day the place would normally inject me with something, I don't know what but just a bad day" I sighed and he kissed my head again.

"Thank you for telling me" he said into my hair I hummed and his hands ran up and down my arms relaxing me "pepper suggested that I go to Bruce for a blood test maybe he'll be able to tell me what they where giving me" I laughed a little "but I kind of dropped him out of instinct one day and then stood on his chest, I apologised a lot" Loki chuckled "did he turn green?" He asked "no, why?, oh shit is he the hulk" I never knew that creature had a human side I only ever saw the green side, Loki nodded.

I played with his large hands for a while then we got out the bath, it's one in the afternoon I still need to go to Bruce's and then Natasha and Wanda said they want to see me before the party and then I need to get dressed.

I dressed myself kissed Loki bye then went to the elevator "Jarvis take me to Bruce" I asked the roof "Bruce is in lab one" the elevator started moving god knows where the hell lab one is.

The doors opened and I saw three glass walls and a man with his back turned in one hoping it was bruce I knocked "yeah tony finally" he said turning around "your not tony" he said pointing to me "no I'm not" I smiled walking in the lab "I was hoping you could do a blood test and maybe see what hydra was injecting me with" I sat next to him on a stool.

He nodded "yeah I can, just give me two seconds" he held up his hand "ok" I said looking at what he was doing. He looked like he was building a robot or rebuilding one since he knew all the parts. I heard a click then he turned around.

"Alright, my medical lab is next door so we'll go there" he pointed to a door, I got off the drool and followed him.

He unlocked it and we walked in "ok sit there" he pulled out a chair for me, I put my arm on the table and rolled up my sleeve "ever done this?" Yes Bruce I have "yeah, well I've been injected with things" I said looking at the needle "ok good, shouldn't hurt to much then" the front door swung open "Bruce" Tony's voice rang and I turned my head "Alexis?" He pointed at me.

I nodded "she's having a blood test Tony" bruce said putting the needle in "what for?, you ok kiddo" he walked up to us "yeah, I was hoping bruce could tell me what they where injecting into me" I smiled up at tony "ok, sounds good, I'll be next door" he pointed and then left.

Bruce finished with the blood test "Should be done in a couple days, my machine is being stupid" he put ehe tube in a small bag "thank you Bruce" I stood up "you coming tonight?" He asked before I left "yes I am, it'll be fine" he nodded and I left.

"Alex" Natasha said from down the hall "yeah?" I turned around "wand and I have been looking for you everywhere, anyways let's go" she grabbed my arm and pulled me to the elevator "what's the rush" I asked "Jarvis to the main floor" she said urgently.

She was starting to worry me "Natasha what's wrong" she looked pale "Bucky is going crazy in his room" she held my hand "he's screaming about a fridge and the weapons vault" I closed my eyes pushing out my own memories.

The elevator doors opened and I ran to Winters room the door was locked so I unlocked it but first I scanned the room to see where he is, he's on his bed his body temperature is really high and he's confused and scared "Natasha don't come in" I warned her when she got around the corner.

I slowly opened the door muting the sound of it so I don't startle him "winter" I softly said closing the door behind me "alpha" he stood up and ran to me pulling me into a big bear hug.

He was shaking "the fridge, it's today" his breath was shaking "no winter, I promise we are safe now, no fridge" I said rubbing his back, he sighed "I don't belong here, I've done so many things" he let go of me and slumped on the floor next to the bed.

I followed him on the floor "winter, you have to know your no burden, horrible things happened to you and today is just one of the many days that are going to bring up those memories, I want you to know your not alone, I'm here with you and ready to take on the emotions with you because I am feeling them too" I out my head on his shoulder.

His breathing started to even out then he spoke "I just don't feel safe here, while I'm in here I feel like I'm still there" he pointed to the room "come sit in the main rooms then, I'll spend more time out there with you" I rubbed up his arm "I don't know, Steve is trying to make me remember things I don't and everyone is walking on eggshells around me" he cupped his face.

I pulled his hands away and made him look at me "winter, don't do this to yourself, don't put yourself in isolation and hurt your mind because you are to bothered with what the others are doing" I firmly told him, he slowly nodded "alright you gonna come out with me" I stood up and held out my hand "sure, but give me five minutes first" he smiled "sure, I'll be down the hall" I opened the door.

Natasha was waiting on the other side of the hall "is he ok?" She asked leaning off the wall and to me "I don't know" I rubbed my eyes "he's not doing great but I've seen worse" I walked to me room "I'll meet with you and Wanda in a hour" I opened the door and closed it behind me.

I sat on my bed and my head fell into my hands, the tears started to fall. Today is a horrible day that for the last twenty years I have been so worried about coming winter was my source is stability and now she's falling apart. He's right, this place doesn't feel like home, hydra didn't either but I grew up there. This is all new and everyone just wants us to be open and adapt with the click of our fingers and I can't do it anymore.

The last four months have been wonderful on the outside but when I'm alone the sadness and feeling like a burden filters in.

Someone knocked on my door and it opened, Loki stepped in. I tried to stop the sobbing and tears but I couldn't. "Alexis, what's wrong love" he was at my side in seconds "I can't do this anymore Loki, everything is out of order and my whole life has been controlled for me I don't know what I'm doing" I cried Lokis arms went around me.

I leaned into his chest and still cried, he didn't say anything, he didn't need to I just wanted him to be with me.

He kissed my hair "Alexis, let's skip the party tonight, stay here and relax your days been hard enough as it is" he said rubbing my back "tony will understand" he knew what I was thinking.

I nodded not in the mood to deal with everyone, I pulled myself off his chest and wrapped my arms around his neck so I could see his face "I love you, Loki" I kissed his lips. It was a passionate kiss, loving.

When it was over he put his forehead on mine "I love you more, Alexis" he kissed me again. This kiss felt different not driving by dominance but love.

We stayed the rest of the night in bed after I checked up on winter, and then I checked up on him a couple more times through out the night.