𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐬

Chapter 16 - Revenge is sweet

3:00pm

Promise and Xara walked into Maternity Queens in Lenox Mall after going house hunting.
They settled on a classic 2.5 acre estate, with a black and white exterior in Tuxedo park. It was a beautiful home with mature landscaping, a 3 car garage, detached guesthouse, with a pool and gazebo included. The 5 bedrooms and bathrooms were insanely large and Promise couldn't wait to decorate.
2 more weeks and they were gonna be able to move in after closing on the dreamy home. Onyx was sparing no expense. Even after hearing that the house located in buckhead would run him 3.45 million dollars. She offered to go half with him and was immediately shut down. The gesture was appreciated by her but she didn't want him doing things he'd later regret because he was trying so hard to get in good with her again.

"I never got to ask you how you feel about becoming a mommy." Xara inquired while combing through clothing racks with her fingers, trying to find clothes that looked like they fit Promise. They were maternity clothes shopping after she complained about not being able to fit any of her regular stuff.

"Honestly, I really don't know. Onyx has been happy about it since we first found out, but me... not so much." Promise shrugged while scanning a relaxed fit dress with her eyes.

Xara stopped combing the clothing racks and stared at Promise intently. Promise noticed her staring and furrowed her eyebrows wondering why she was staring so hard. "What do you mean, you... not so much?" Xara questioned with a curious face expression.

Promise sighed and put her head down, feeling embarrassed about how she felt.
She knew Xara would never judge her, but she couldn't help the self consciousness that she kept at bay.
"I'm scared that I'm not going to be a good mother. It's tearing me apart because since I've been pregnant I haven't felt a connection with my unborn. Onyx boasts about how we're gonna be dope parents but I can't help but feel different. I've been trying to tell him that I wasn't ready for a child but everytime I go to try, the excitement on his face stops me. The baby I lost with Javon really messed up my perception of motherhood. I wanted my baby so much and lost her or him due to his carelessness. Now that I have a second chance I'm not happy about it. Especially since what happened last month. Cassidy being pregnant at the same time as me has me second guessing things as well. We're moving too fast and backwards, plus having issues and I hate it." Promise confessed through tears.

Xara rushed over to Promise and pulled her into a hug. "I would've never thought in a million years that you felt like this. I'm so sorry Prom, you deserve to be happy and the fact that it's being ruined by something that should normally bring you peace is fucked up. I like Onyx but I'm starting to feel like he's not ready or clearly thinking about what he's giving or presenting in terms of y'all relationship."

"You have to tell him how you feel. I know you like keeping the peace but if something isn't right to you, you have the right to express that. And if he truly loves you like he says he do he'll understand. Also stop giving that bitch Cassidy space in your mind she's desperate and irrelevant. Like honestly, I can just smell the deception coming off of her ass I wouldn't be surprised if she did something sneaky to get pregnant by Onyx because he clearly don't want her."Xara said through an eye roll.

"And as far as you and my godchild goes, I guarantee all of the worries and doubt you have will fade as soon as you see their beautiful face." Xara finished before smoothing over Promise's hair.

Promise felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She was so busy sulking in her own misery that she hadn't thought about things like Xara had put it. "What would I do without you? Promise asked before sniffling.

"No, what would we do without eachother? This wisdom and strength I have is due to our friendship. We've taught eachother REAL life lessons coming from the background we came from. You got this just turn that boss up a little more and stop stressing, everything will come together."