Don't Leave Me Behind

Hata

My grandmother was born in 1920s she was not sure exact date . Her words were full of wisdom and compassion. Even tho she was illiterate she was very smart . She told stories from the bottom of her heart and shared with love .

That day was special and shared with me her struggles and her victory's .

My grandmother was the only daughter she had 3 older brothers . Her mother and father had a decent life . Land and livestock and they did well for the family. When she was 12 her father got sick and passed away suddenly. Her mother remarried and left her with her 3 bothers .

She said it was the worst time of her life . They made it impossible to live especially when they found out that the father left everything to her . She didn't specifically name them or talk much about them , except that they worked her to death and tried everything possible to kill her so they can take over everything.

Since she was illiterate and didn't know much about owning land or anything about it . She just fought for her life day to day .

As years passed and not having a parent around to defend her or guide her . With tears in her eyes she said ' someone in the neighborhood told me my mother was married in a village that was close by and she has a son . I missed her so much and didn't hate her that she left us . I forgive her but I just wanted to see her and hug her and have her tell me that everything will be ok .

So the next day when she was going to get water she sneaked off to go find her mom . One of the girls for the village decided to join her . They hid their buckets in a ditch and covered them with grass and proceeded down the road .

They chitchatted and giggled . As they approached the little road where it lead to a fenced house where her mother was the new wife and a mother . Her heart skipped a beat . She caught a glance of her brown hair in a braid and she yelled mom . Her mother didn't make a move . She yelled again ' mama ' her mom slowly lifted her head and glanced at her and put her head down .

Tears filled her face and she quickly wiped them . That was the last time I saw her . I was told she was forbidden to have anything to do with us now . She is a married woman now to a different man .

As we walked back my heart was broken in a million pieces . Loosing my father was hard enough and today I lost my mother . Watching her from a distance like a stranger that will forever have a hole in my heart .

The walk was about 30 min and I had to hurry back home before we get caught . There were young men working on something and they kept glancing at us . One caught my eye . He was tall with dark hair and green eyes . He had a beautiful smile . He greeted us as we passed and we moved faster just to get out of sight .

As she went on her face lit up . I would see him almost every day . He would greet me and smile and eventually we would start to have little conversation here and there . I was falling in love and so was he .

I was 15 years old and he asked me to marry him . He came from a very poor family but hard working . I agreed to meet him and runaway with him and I did.

I loved him so much . He was everything to me . At night I would stay up and watch him sleep . I was so happy and in love . It felt like it was to good to be true that such a man could love like that .

I thought she was talking about grandpa ( he passed away in the late 80s )

Nana so you and grandpa were so in love . She goes nooooo

This was my first and only love . My first husband that was killed in world war 1 . I never got over him and I will never love anyone as much as I loved him . When I had our son he went into the army and never came back . I never forgave my self for letting him go .

She then told me years later she married grandpa and they had 5 children and lived a good life .

If I survived then we will survive this .

My mind went spiraling ! I had so many questions but I could tell she said enough for today . I gave her a big hug and told her I loved her much . Those hugs were something special.