the end (boyxboy) (on hold)

monday

   The next morning was not like the others. I didn't wake up with regret. I didn't feel like I was waking up to another nightmare. I woke up feeling...comforted and warm. I wasn't scared. I didn't feel like dissapearing. I glanced up to see the reason why my moods changed. Kevin.

Don't get attached. You know he's just using you. He'll end up hating you. Like everyone else. He'll throw you away when he finds someone else. He doesn't truly live you.

    The voice in my head was right. He would end up hating me later. I can't get attached. I can't. I won't.

    I slowly slid out of bed and sighed before walking to the restroom. I brushed my teath and once I felt it was clean enough, I rinsed my mouth with water. I stood there with my palms on the sink, staring at my reflection.

You ugly fat ass. Why can't you do anything right? Why can't you be normal? Why can't you be like everyone else? Pretty, handsome, nice, loving. Why do you have to be...you.

I quickly glanced down at my hands and held back tears.

"Dammit." I muttered angrily to myself.

I felt arms wrap around my waist, causing me to squeal and jump, trying to run away from the hands that could do who knows what to me. The arms pulled me back, forcefully but carefully, against someone's toned chest.

"Shh, bear it alright. Don't be scared. What's the matter?" The voice whispered into my ear.

I relaxed as I realized who it was. Kevin. I knew that voice.

"N-nothing, you just surprised me. You know how my past is. Hands aren't my best friends." I replied, turning in his arms to look up at him. I didn't want to talk about the voices in my head. He'd think I was weird.

"Aw bear, its alright. But you looked upset before I came in here.." He said.

My hear fluttered at the nickname, it sounded a little weird but it sounded like it had a lot of meaning behind it by the way he said it.

"I was just thinking" I muttered then stood on my tip toes and kissed him, wrapping my arms around his neck. I would do anything to avoid talking about what went on in my mind.

Kevin lightly squeezed his arms around my waist and kissed back. It was comforting and reassuring.

Don't get attached you dumbass!

The voice reminded me.

I pulled back, just a little and forced a smile for his eyes. He smiled back so easily. I wanted to be able to do that. To smile easily. To smile without trouble.

He unexpectedly slid his hands down to my arse and squeezed it lightly. I squeeled and jumped forward, making him hit the restroom door and laugh. I playfully hit his chest and pouted.