What is life? || Jinkook

chapter 80

After 1 week of arriving at their new apartment;

There was a beautiful park for children to play and a lake near the apartment ..

So during the weekend , jungkook decided to go on a walk near the lake, he originally came outside to get some groceries but looking at the lake he changed his way ..

After walking for a while , he sat near the edge , out of shoes, dipping his feet under the water and closes his eyes

Trying to relax his mind

While he hums a song, he wrote on his diary few days back ;

Besides you who knows the state of my heart , o my lord!!

In front of you , I suffered through hell ,o my lord!!

How do I describe you the cruelties done to me

Who will listen to my story?

There is no companion whom I can share my griefs

Oh my lord!!

The false becomes the truth here

But I didn't say a word

This loneliness

This grief

Now;

Defines my life

And I know now, 

My existence in this world is nothing than a grain of sand

Sometimes wandering in the lonely mornings

Sometimes looking out into the barren nights

Sometimes awakening with teary eyes

Sometimes thinking abt the past moments

I spent my days like this

But there's wish ,  a moment of hope

The belief that I have in my lord

I know;

My existence is nothing in this world than a grain of sand

What should I tell you? what I want?

I just want the reward of my patience

I would like to preserve some of my memories

I want the reward for the pain I have suffered through

I think;

I should make a place for pain in my heart

Or may be ?

I should get the one who was mine

I hope my world always remains filled with happiness

And beliefs becomes reality

But I know ;

My existence in this world is nothing but a grain of sand .

Jk:-

Aahh!

Hoba ! Sometimes I wish I could just tell you I'm not dead , I'm alive,  I have so much to tell you, I wanted you to scold me , I wanted you with me so bad, but I don't have any of your contact details, idk where is my previous phone is, ik I can get your number easily if I went to my home in seoul