10 years, to fall in love

Chapter three

He satisfies my unrestrained curiosity and imagination. He is my encyclopedia and my Wiki decryption. There are only questions I can't think of, and there are no questions he can't answer.  He does better job than Google.

In terms of his skill set, he is the best programmer in his studio, and he is the last line of defense if some tech problems remain challenging.

In my eyes, there isn't anything that he doesn't know. The coding questions that are tremendously challenging to me are one piece of cake to him and he always solves it in minutes or even seconds. I fell in admiration for him.

I can't help myself from falling for him, so I confessed 🙈

He couldn't accept me like this, as he thought I was pranking him because almost no girl in his life liked him romantically, let alone confessed to him.

He asked me to stop teasing him because it made him very uncomfortable as I already have a boyfriend.

His rationality made me suffer, am I not cute enough to catch your attention and to make you like me? 😭

I deliberately ignored his request and teased him again and again, and as expected he did not reciprocate my teasing and affection.

But gradually, he started to send me more messages, I would tease him and say: send me a message = miss me?  He simply ignored answering it instead said something completely irrelevant.

Until one day, we were discussing about meeting up in real life, he said that he was not very comfortable with the idea, I wondered why?

He admitted that he was drawn to me too.  🙈

I resented: if I never confessed first, you would never notice me, wouldn't you?  He said yes, because I was like a bro in his eyes, as I actively matchmake for him and encouraged him dating other girls.

Long after he reciprocated, he told me that he would never admit to himself, before I confessed to him, he had already had some feelings for me, and teaching me coding was his motives to rush home after work. He was so good at multi tasking before, but once he got so distracted by my eyes in a call, my doe eyes, a frown and a smile seemed to touch his heartstrings. Since that, he had stopped multi-tasking when he was teaching me.

Those days before we met, I was very happy. I worked out in the afternoon, walked the dog in the evening, and studied coding with him until the early morning. They were one of my happiest days. I was carefree and looked forward to talking to him every day.  Been looking forward to hearing something from him during the day, watching closely to the point when he was about to finish work.

One day I told him seriously: I love you.  Although we have known each other for ten years, why didn't we get to know you well before, I regret 😭 and I blamed him for not getting to know me better and making the first move.  He also felt bad. 

However, it is understandable, because at that time we were in different stages of life and had different views on life. Our interests and hobbies were completely different (although they still are).  Our lives did not intersect.

He didn't say that he loves me too, and of course I was sad for that, but I also understood that it's too early, after all, it's only been two weeks since I confessed.

I'm just so reckless and impetuous. I've completely fallen head over heels for him, my Arthur, my love.