The Book Of Forbidden One Shots | SLOW UPDATES

The Lightning Ninja

Day 5: From Moments to Memories

Jay always thought there was nothing that could break his positive thinking. He was so damn wrong.

"We are gathered here today, to honor the memory of Nya." Master Wu started off and Jay could already feel his composure breaking. He was trying, he really was, for the sake of the team and everyone else that was gathered in front of them today.

It would've been stupid to break down now. When there would be hundreds and thousands of eyes watching him do so.

"Inventor. Samurai X. Ninja. Master of Water. And, our dearest friend." My Yang. Jay wanted to say out loud, but he knew better than to disrupt the ceremony.

Instead, he followed what he was supposed to do and poured the water from his tin into the vase that was gathered in the center. Jay watched the flow of the water and wished he could grab onto it, now that Nya was practically made out of it.

He could remember how he tried to reach out to her only to fail, his hand pushing past her like she was some sort of ghost. Jay never thought his heart would shatter into more pieces when she decided to leave them...forever.

Jay composed himself, shaking some sense into his mind before he did something he'd come to regret. The least he could do is give Nya the farewell she deserved, no matter how much he wanted to scream out his heart's content to the wind.

It was bundled up in knots now and they grew tighter with every mention of her that it wouldn't take long before Jay struggled to breathe.

Master Wu's voice was on the verge of breaking, he realized, and only continued for the sake of everyone else. "Her courage and strength have saved us, time and time again. And although we—we were unable to save her, we will always remember her."

Oh, how Jay wished for her presence right now. That would save him from this pull of insanity that was threatening to tighten its grip on him with every passing second. Jay didn't think it was fair that she was the one they were saying farewell too.

Hell, he didn't want to say farewell to anyone.

Especially when this one could mean forever.

He didn't want to live a life without looking into those ocean blue eyes that were the first ones to greet him every morning. He didn't want to continue the day without catching a glimpse of the smile that could brighten his world within a second.

Jay couldn't decide if it was harder to say goodbye to her or to every little moment they shared every single day. They were memories now, Jay realized, but somehow that hurt him even more.

He was trying, Jay was trying so hard he knew it was visible in his face.

"Wherever she is now, she is in our hearts." Jay couldn't hold back his tears any longer as they pooled on the edge of his eyes. 

The same way he allowed himself to mourn for her even if every part of him knew she wasn't gone. She wasn't dead. She was just...not with them anymore. 

All their memories flashed through his mind, from the moment they first met, to their first kiss, to the first time he lost her at the hands of Nadakhan, the second to the sushi master of Prime Empire, and now.

The only difference was, Jay got her back instantly during the first few times.

He knew now that it wasn't possible for that to happen. Not when she physically merged herself with the sea, a feat that cannot be undone as Benthomaar had informed them.

The knots in his heart grew tighter and Jay gasped for breath, unaware of the tears there had been gathering in his eyes until he shut them right, allowing it to fall onto his freckled cheeks.