Limerence • h.s.

19.

My body jolted a bit as the bus parked, my eyes groggily opening at the sudden movement. I must have been sleeping pretty lightly. I heard noise outside, sure the other busses had people piling out of them to race to their beds for the night. Niall was still dead asleep as I scanned the room, trying to fully wake up. I groaned as I sat up, the bus couch being the most uncomfortable piece of furniture I'd ever encountered. I let my head rest in my hands for a few moments before Frank and Megan slipped through the door. "Good, you're awake. Let's go," Frank said, his head resting on Megan's shoulder as he stood behind her.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," I say, exhaling a deep breath before standing to my feet with a groan. I stretch everything in my body before slumping over and throwing a pillow at Niall, telling him to get up. The four of us step outside and I note the thick air, even at 10:00 pm. Summer was here and May was coming to a close. Frank was in a shit mood, clearly still needing a hundred more hours of sleep before he was back on his feet. He handed me my bags from the bus and I hauled them over my shoulders, patiently waiting for Megan.

We walked into the hotel and I immediately looked around. It was simple but, as usual, Harry had booked the nicest hotel in the city and it showed. Megan was bolting it to the front desk to check in and I let her do all the talking as I just stood next to her, resting my body against the counter. The lady at the desk was in a worse mood than us and Megan was not having it. She barely spoke two words as she tapped her fingers on the counter in the most annoying fashion possible. The lady placed the keycards on the counter before sitting back down in her chair to do God knows what for the rest of the night.

Megan complained about it the entire way up the elevator and I just listened, giving her nonverbal cues here and there. I was tired and just wanted to sleep everything my body was feeling off. I had avoided my phone, not wanting to check if Harry had responded. I was angry, annoyed, and just exhausted. I had my own shit to deal with and I didn't need Harry to be one of them. It was going to be easier to just avoid him, and not hang out with him unless other people were around. At this point, I didn't even want to be friends with him if it was this much work.

Here I was thinking the guy was just trying to shield me from some deranged idea that he might hurt me, but finally gave in. And I was expecting things to be easier after last night. That, maybe, he would finally see that I'm capable of handling myself and he didn't have to be so fucking confusing all of the time. Hot and cold every single day and my head was spinning so hard it was nearly falling off. I don't need that. I've physically been out of Jackson's grasp for nearly a month now and mentally been away for longer than I can remember. I'm moving on, and that's a good thing. Everyone thinks I'm some fragile body that needs to be coddled. But I'm a grown woman who had the strength to leave my abusive boyfriend and now I want to push forward.

If Harry wanted to act like I was too fragile then I was going to mind my own business from now on. No more back and forth, and definitely no more kissing. Regardless of how amazing the kiss was, how I was instantly addicted to the feeling of his hands on my skin, or how I loved the noises he made when I grinded my body into his. Jesus. No, Cecily. Enough of that. I'm shutting it down. Again.

I wave to Megan as she stops at her door, unlocking it and telling me goodnight. I walked down the hallway by myself, reaching the end of it before seeing my room. This time I was in the last room, different from usual. I wondered briefly if Harry was in the room next to me, or maybe across the hall, but ignored my thoughts as the lock clicked with a beep.

I slipped inside, struggling with my bags before giving up and tossing them on the ground. I blindly felt around for the light switch before flicking it on to illuminate the entryway. The main portion of the room was still quite dark but the one light showed me an idea of how big it was. The room was huge and for a moment I wondered if there had been a mistake. That maybe this was Harry's room and they accidentally gave me the key.