How We Match // Hyunlix

Four

F E L I X

In the dark, the world looks slightly different from what it usually does. Felix, for a moment, can picture how they entered a different reality when they stepped onto this rooftop. A different dimension like in the movies, where everything looks almost the same but there are tiny differences too. Like the carpet of his hotel room would be blue and not gray when he got back, and his phone case would be white and his mother would have a different maiden name.

It's not cold up here, tucked away on the private terrace only they have the key for. The wind doesn't hit the spot and it's warm in New York, still even now that it's dark. There are three wooden benches to sit on, two smaller ones, where Felix had tucked his feet under Changbin's thighs on one of them earlier, while Seungmin, Chan, and Jeongin had occupied the other. The third one doesn't have a backrest but it's much bigger, and when they'd come up here hours ago, Hyunjin and Jisung had claimed it immediately, Minho just trotting behind.

"I'm gonna go to bed," Jisung says and sits up, New York lights dancing on his face.

It's way past midnight here, and it's only Hyunjin, Jisung, and Felix left, all the others have gone back inside at some point. They've all been too wired and jet-lagged to go to bed at a reasonable time, and mindful of the precious free time they have so little of, in places they'd love to explore but only see the insides of concerts halls, restaurants, and studios of. Changbin had found the spot, or was told by someone, Felix doesn't really know, so they'd all gone up here after schedule, like giddy children on a trip with their parents.

"I'm gonna stay a little while longer," Hyunjin says from where he's sprawled out on the bench, head pillowed in his hands. His voice is small as if he's talking to himself more than either of them.

Jisung looks at Felix.

"I'll stay, too." Felix sits up, stretching just to cover up the sudden nerves. They evaporate quickly but leave a weird aftertaste, like a tingle in the back of his mind he can't shake.

"Okay, goodnight then," Jisung gets up and walks over to the door leading back inside. "Don't stay too long or I'll tell," he throws over his shoulder, and it's a testament to how tired he is that it almost sounds serious.

"I bet you Channie-hyung is not sleeping yet either," Felix shoots back.

"Oh, I'm gonna tell Binnie. He'll be dragging your asses into your rooms."

Felix laughs and watches Jisung go, and he pretends it's not because now that Jisung is gone he's alone with Hyunjin. They haven't been in a while, not really, not for long enough to make it count before one of the others barged in, and he's weirdly nervous about it.

"Come sit with me," Hyunjin says in English and pats the spot beside him without looking over.

Felix does. He grabs the hoodie he has with him and crawls onto the bench, lying down beside Hyunjin, using it as a pillow. The mood has fully changed now. It has done so with every member leaving as if every combination of them is its own unique thing, and they have to adjust to every addition or subtraction of each member.

With only Hyunjin and Felix left, Felix sees their universe as a quiet one, intimate and soft, but with a sort of tension sitting on top of their skin that Felix can't quite put his finger on. Not a tension of fear or discomfort, but of possibility. Of opportunity.

"The planes look like stars," Hyunjin says and pulls Felix's attention towards him. He smiles with his eyes sparkling, gaze turned to the sky. "They move fast and blink. Look." He pulls his hands away from his head and points, and Felix only does look once Hyunjin catches him staring at his face instead. Felix shuffles closer to him, their heads not quite touching, and he looks up and tries to find the specific plane Hyunjin pointed out.