Hold On (l.s.)

t w o

February 1st, 2012
Holmes Chapel, Cheshire
Home of Anne Cox, Gemma Styles and Robin Twist

"Haaaaa-ppyyy BIRTH-day dear HAAAAAAArrryyyy, HAAA-ppy BIRTH-day to YOU"
"Hip-hip!" Louis shouted.
"Hooray!"
"Hip-hip!"
"Hooray!"
"Hip-hip!"
"Hooray!"

"Happy birthday, baby." Louis says softly, gently pressing his lips to my nose. I let out an embarrassing giggle, pulling him into a tight hug.

"Right, we get it, you're in love, but Louis, help me with the plates?" Gemma asks, rolling her eyes from the other end of the table.

"Yup, I'm coming Gems." he responds, quickly letting go of me with a kiss on the cheek and a squeeze of my hand.

"Okay, so I know you told us not to get you anything, but-"
"Mum, what'd you do?" I roll my eyes. Ever since the X-factor, I always tell her not to buy me a gift. I have literally millions of pounds, she doesn't need to waste her money.

"Right, well I didn't spend any money. I promise. But I figured you might still want a gift. So come with me."

She stands abruptly, grabbing my hand excitedly and tugging me down the hallway. Gemma, Louis and Robin follow us down the hallway, leaving Mike and Amy in the dining room, not that they care.

Before I realise what's happening, I'm blindfolded roughly by Gemma, with shouts of "be careful!" and "don't hurt him!" from Louis and Mum. I'm not made of glass, yet they both still act as though I am. I guess it comes from a place of love?

"Okay, hold my hand babe." Lou says, brushing his hand against the back of mine. I grab ahold and he gently tugs me into the guest bedroom, that was once mine, whilst mum, Gems and Rob stay in the doorway. With much gentler hands than Gemma's, Lou unties the blindfold, instructing me to keep my eyes closed.

"Okay, honey, you can open them." I hear my mum's voice say.
"Surprise!" I hear a somewhat familiar voice shout, though I can't recall it's owner.

I open my eyes to the sight of my once-best-friends, Will, Alex, Roy and Brad.

"White Eskimo is reunited, baby!" Brad shouts.
"C'mere," Alex says, pulling me in for a tight hug. "We've missed our superstar." Roy adds, joining in on the hug. Soon we're all in a clump, the four of them squashing around me. It's chaotic, but it's good chaotic.

"Don't you idiots break my boyfriend!" 
"We won't, Tomlinson!" Will returns.
"You better not!" Louis threatens playfully.

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December 17th, 2017
Doncaster Royal Infirmary
Private meeting room

"Zayn, get the fuck out of here." I spit harshly, Liam glaring at the ground behind the raven-haired man.
"Harry. I just want-" Zayn begins, but I cut him off prematurely.
"You don't get to want anything. I'm asking you now to leave. If  Louis gets out of this place, I'll ask if he wants to make amends with you. But in case you didn't realise, he's currently comatose, so you being here won't fix anything between you." I finish sharply. Niall sighs, whispers something to Liam, and turns back to his conversation with Daisy. 

"Harry, I'm not just here for Louis. I need to talk to you."

I'm taken aback, but I quickly regain my composure enough to spit back a cold reply.

"What makes you think I want anything to do with you?" I force out.
"Harry, I-"
"No, y'know what, right now my fiance is laying comatose in a hospital bed, because he tried to fucking kill himself, so I need to be with him. And you need to go back to Los Angeles or New York or Bradford or wherever the fuck you've been since you left the band, left us."
"Fiancé?" he stares at the floor as he says that word.
"Yes. Fiancé. Now I need to get back to his room, because I need him to be okay, I need him, I-"

I turn my back to him, and Liam, who sits behind him, watches desperately. The heels of my chelsea boots click loudly on the linoleum floors, echoing in the mostly empty corridor as I exit the meeting room to make my way back to Louis' hospital room. Suddenly, Zayn's smooth voice is ringing through the corridor, as he stands in the doorway.

"Harry, I wanted to apologise. And explain myself?"

I pause, his words ringing in my mind.

He wants to apologise.

Go get some answers.

Turn around.

Do it.

"I don't want to hear that from you." I respond harshly, not turning around despite the invisible string tugging on me, telling me to go back. "I don't want to hear anything from you. Ever again. You know what you did. So stay away from me and my fiancé until and unless he reaches out to you. Which sure as hell won't happen while he's laying in there. Get out of this hospital, or I will call the cops and have you get out." 

That's no empty threat, either, though the lump in my throat already regrets the actions I have not yet taken.

I want to forgive Zayn, truly I do, but it feels like a betrayal. Like I'm turning my back on Louis.

I'm no saint, that much is true. I've hurt people who I never wanted to see get hurt, least of all at my hands, but Zayn... Zayn has broken hearts, ignored the people who really care, written hypocritical songs about how nobody is there when all we wanted to do was be there. I may have my demons, but at least I keep them trapped inside. I don't let them run wild.

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DISCLAIMER: THIS IS FICTION, LOOSELY BASED ON THE PUBLIC PERSONA AND NAMES OF HARRY STYLES, LOUIS TOMLINSON, AND THEIR FAMILY AND FRIENDS. I MEAN NO HARM OR OFFENSE TO THEM NOR THE OTHER 'CHARACTERS' THAT ARE FEATURED IN THIS STORY.