#kidnapped ° hyunho ✓

six

- in which gen z hyunjin organizes a therapy session for gangsters -

minho actually liked hyunjin and did not want to kill him, but he was a tsundere.

"i want to kill myself three times a day," hyunjin shot back. "get in line."

gen z depression hit different, but this was because gen z were here to smash the stigma of mental health.

timidly, changbin peeked from behind the wardrobe. "i actually feel like that too."

"yeah, me too," jeongin admitted sadly.

hyunjin gasped. "why aren't you takin' care of your mental health?" this could not do. mental health was a priority. "you know that tik tok, when i get rich, you're gettin' therapy, you're gettin' therapy, and everyone's gettin' therapy?"

the only answer that he got was blank stares.

"well," he continued, "i am rich, so you're gettin' therapy, you're gettin' therapy, and everyone here is gettin' therapy now." he pointed his finger first at changbin, then at jeongin, and finally at minho.

an hour later, all the gangsters were sat in the living room. hyunjin sat opposite them, behind a huge round table.

"okay, jeongin, thanks for sharin'. from what you have told me, it seems to me that you're an aquarius. there's sadly no medication for that. next?" he took a sip from the glass of almond milk. "this drink is bussin'."

"my girlfriend cheated on me three times," changbin began, "and–"

"well, it's your problem that you're datin' a hoe," hyunjin interrupted. "if you had broken up with her after the first time she cheated, you won't be havin' this problem now. i'll give you my best friend's insta. he's boujee, but he'll treat you right. next?"

felix's low voice sounded: "i feel stressed all the time."

hyunjin pretended to jot this down in his notebook. "have you tried drinkin' water? ... you have. okay." he bit into the tip of the pen. "you know, you just have to focus on gettin' guap and bein' chill. that's it. next?"

he looked up as he did not hear anyone start speaking. it turned out that minho was the only one left. he was staring at hyunjin with that swoon-worthy gaze, and he looked snatched in that black t-shirt.

"what's your problem?" hyunjin asked. "if you think you're depressed, maybe you just need a cheugy, millennial espresso 'cause less depresso–"

"i really fucking like you," the gang leader deadpanned.

a/n:

i am sorry for not posting on sunday :)