Romancing the Son of Heaven

Stratagem 23: Make Use of Weak Moments! (3)

Jing He couldn't calm down at all after awakening from such a dream. While he did lie back down, sleep did not want to come back. Instead, the longer he lay there, the more often those thoughts went through his head, making him become even more agitated instead.

In the end, he pushed back the blanket and got up, putting on his outer robe again, and went out of the palace and into the garden. He strode around between the flower beds, hoping that the breeze would be able to cool his head and the familiar sight calm his heart. He just shouldn't think about it any longer. Whether it was a dream or the dragon king himself, it was best to seal it off somewhere in the deeper recesses of his mind. Obviously, it was not good to associate with this.

He sighed and then looked up to the sky, watching the twinkling stars. This ... was probably a bit like that legendary night when Xing and Tian met. The stars above, the one named after them on the ground, gazing silently while trapped in desolation. Nobody was there to help him ease the pain and there was only that one person that silently watched him, finally deciding to end his suffering.

It was a pity that contrary to Xing, he would not have this chance. There wouldn't be the perfect man appearing in front of him just a few days later, asking for his hand in marriage. Even if there was, his parents wouldn't just agree. Well, his mother might but his father definitely wouldn't. Getting married ... he feared that he would have to wait at least another millennium.

Jing He sighed again and then went over to the pavilion where he had sat with Qiu Ling today. He sat down again, looking at the other seat opposite him, feeling himself in a subtle mood now that he was here alone.

This man ... He had already become such a huge part of his life. Most likely, even if they were married, they would not be able to spend much more time with each other than they did right now. The only difference was in the title only.

Right now, the dragon king was just the dragon king and he was just the Son of Heaven. Between them ... They were just two people important to two allied races. Personally, there was nothing between them. If only that could be changed. If only ... Then maybe he wouldn't have to feel this bad about his intense longing ... It would not be wrong if it was one's own fiance one longed for. But a man with no official relationship with him ... How could he dare to do that?

Jing He closed his eyes and a hint of pain crossed his face. This identity of his was truly cursed. It wasn't as if he hadn't known before but up until now, he hadn't felt the implications as heavily.

Yes, maybe he needed to be more careful than others did to be able to live a secure life but he had never felt that there was something that he wanted and couldn't have because of who he was. But now ... Now, he really understood. Being the Heavenly Emperor's son, it really wasn't anything good.

There were a few drops of tears clinging to his lashes when he opened his eyes again and looked up at the sky once more. He kind of wished that he had never realized his feelings for the dragon king. Then he wouldn't feel like this now.

He could just go on living his life every day like before, feeling that it was actually slightly annoying to have to entertain somebody every day. It wouldn't hurt as much. It wouldn't make him question his identity, his future, his whole existence. But no matter how much he resented the situation he was in, it wouldn't change anything. He could only take it as it was and learn to live with it.

He sighed and took a few deep breaths, raising his arm and likely dabbing at his eyes with his sleeve. Wiping away the tears, he forced a smile on his lips and then returned to the palace. He took off his robe and slipped back into bed, pulling the blanket up to his chin. Tomorrow ... Maybe he would find a way to deal with this tomorrow. Anyway, he did not have another choice. He could do nothing but find a way to learn to live with this.