Dear mom, I miss you...《English》

3 - So close...but yet so far

It's something before twelve o'clock when whe start walking back to our home. When we arrive I see my grandma's car in front of the house. I start running and find her on the bench that's standing in the sun next to the front door, she's reading one of my mom's books.

I wave at her, 'Hi grandma!'

She looks up from the book and smiles at me, 'Hello my darling.'

I walk up to her and give her a hug. I hear my dad and Eva walking up the drive behind me.

'Good afternoon Magg.' Says my dad who walks up to her to shake her hand.

'Good afternoon boy. And Eva of course.' She looks past dad to see her face. Eva shakes her hand too and smiles.

'Do you want to come in for some thee before you and Emmily go to Jane?' My dad asks her.

'I would love to.'

After my mom died my grandma was left alone, grandpa died about a year before my mom and she didn't have any more children. She came by often so she wouldn't be so alone all day. When my dad met Eva my grandma immediately liked her. She told my dad that she would be okay with it if he would date her and that she wouldn't feen betrayed for my mom. He told her he wasn't ready for a new relationship, but I think it helped him a lot to know she was okay with it. Around my birthday last year my grandma had a depression and she lived with us for a while so we could take care of her. She and Eva got to know eachother really well and from that moment Eva felt like her own child to her. I always hated it because I thought it was mean to my mom, but this morning my I changed my mind. I don't know how or why, it just happened within a second.

'Are you coming too?' Eva wakes me up from my thoughts.

'Yeah...yeah sorry. I'm coming.'

We walk into the house and go to the living room. My grandma it sitting on the couch and smiles at us. We sit down too and about a minute later my dad walks in with the thee.

'Can we have cookies too?' I ask him. 'Because of Mother's Day!'

'Of course we can, go get them.'

'Thank you!'

I rush to the kitchen and open the cupboard where the cookies normally are. I look everywhere in the cupboard, but I can't find the cookies. I grab a chair and I gently go up. I upen the upper cupboard and search for the cookies. I slide a few cups aside and then my eye catches something. It's a cup, in the corner of the cupboard. I feel like I've seen it before, but I can't remember when or where. I grab the cup and carefully climb down from the chair. When I stand back on the floor I look at the cup closely. There are letters written on it, they look like they're written by a child. I read the letters carefully:

Dear mommy,

Happy Mother's Day!

I love you!! ❤

-X- Emmily

Did I make this? When? I inspect the cup to see if I can find a date. After a while I find the date; May 13th 2012. That was Mother's Day...the last with my mom. My heart stands still for a moment and I feel how my eyes start tp burn. Before I can even wink my eyes the first tear rolls down my cheek. I bite my lip so stop the tears when I hear my dad's voice, 'Can you find it honey?'

I quickly wipe my tears away and answer his question, 'No, I can't.'

'Let me help you.'

I hear him walking to the kitchen and I put the cup away quick. My dad laughs as he sees me standing on the chair.

'I don't think you will find them there.'

I smile at him awkwardly and climb dowb she chair again. He poits at the little table next to the refrigerator. I scratch my head and laugh as I see the box of cookies standing on the table.

'Found them!'

After we drank the thee and ate some cookies I went upstairs to get the flowers and the letter. I walk into my room and look at the flowers, after I took out the flowers for Eva it looked kinda messy. I walk up my writing desk and sit down on my chair. As gently as possible I try to make the bouque look perfect again and after a few minutes I succeed. I stand up, take the bouquet and the letter and walk back downstairs with a nervous feeling in my stomache. When I enter the living room I see my dad and Eva looking at the letter in my hand.

'What do you have there sweetheart?' my dad asks while pointing to the letter.

'Nothing.' I say and I put away the letter in my pocket quickly.

'Are you ready?' my grandma asks as she stands up from the couch.

'I guess.'

My dad and Eva both stand up too and walk to my grandma's car with us.

'Have a save ride.' Eva sais as she give me a kiss on my cheek.

'We will.'

I give my dad a kiss too and open the car door. I sit on the passenger seat and look at my grandma who is saying goodbye to my dad and Eva too. I take the letter outof my pocket so it wont crease too much. I don't know why I was so shy about it when my dad asked for it, it's not that weird. Maybe because I'm too afraid he would ask me if he could read it. I would be to shy to say no and then he would read about Eva, the bad part. Knowing my father he would just stop reading and me mad before he even reads the good part, the part I worote when I realized that she loves us and that I love her too. I'm sure that when I would try to explain it to him he wouldn't belive it. He wouldn't even belive it if I let him read it! He would probably say something like "I ain't even gonna read it, 'cause I know it's not written there.". I sigh and close my door when I hear the door next to me open. I look at the door and see my grandma sitting down. After she closed the door too she starts the car and starts driving off the drive backwards. I wave at my dad and Eva who are still standing at the drive to wave us goodbye. My grandma turns the can and I wave on last time before we drive away. I look at my grandma with a nervous feeling.

'How long will it take to get there?' I ask her.

'About ten minutes.'

I remain silent and close my eyes. She passed away more than three years ago, I broke at that time. It were three terrible, awful, terrifying and hard years. My dad didn't want to go to her grave, not one single time. Eva tried to make my dad change his mind often, but it didn't work, it only was counterproductive. He became mad and didn't speak to me and for almost a week. Eva took care of me by herself that week. She made breakfast for me, did my hair, brought me to school, picked me up from school, helped me with my homework, played with me and my friendsa, brought me to bed, she even came to my school one day when they needed parents to help. After that week we never talked about it again, nobody, untill my grandma told my dad she wanted to visit my mom's grave with me about a week ago. At first he became really mad and both Eva and I were afraid it would end up the same as the last time, but happily it didn't. I've never went to her grave during those three years thinking it would be far away. But all that time, all those three long long long years, it turned out to be so close, she turned out to be so close.