The Last Hero (Villains & Monsters #2)

Chapter 36

- Mid June, 2045 - (Eleven Months ago)

Jamie waited a couple of days before attempting.

It was a calm afternoon. He wasn't working, he was keeping himself together for the most part, and there was nothing that could set him off at the moment. The last thing he wanted right now was another fight.

He hesitated slightly, then pressed the call button. The phone rang four times before Daija picked up. "Hello?" Her greeting wasn't lively, but it wasn't irritated either.

"Hey," he started, and stopped for a split second when he heard the commotion of giggling children in the background. "Are you busy? I can call back later."

"Eating lunch right now, but I have a few minutes. Is everything alright?" He assumed that she was now worried that something awful was happening with the heroes.

"I'm fine. Things are fine. I just wanted to apologize."

"Jamie-" He heard more giggling in the background, then someone's voice further away, a small sigh. "Silas, you're supposed to eat the spaghetti. Sasha, you're not supposed to wear the spaghetti." He blinked in shock. Was that Simon?

The children and Daija snickered, then Jamie heard her get up to step away. When he heard a door shut, her voice came through again. "Sorry about that. Anyway, like I was saying, forget the apology. I just think we should move on. I'm tired of arguing and going back and forth."

"But I am sorry," he said quietly. "That was bullshit, and you didn't deserve that."

"It's fine, I just..." she trailed off, and he waited patiently for her to continue. "Jamie, what's going on? I get that you're worried, but there has to be something else happening for you to snap that easily." She didn't sound mad, just concerned.

Jamie opened his mouth to speak, then snapped it shut. What could he say? How could he say it without sounding insane, obsessed or pathetic?

He couldn't.

"I broke our rule," he mumbled a half-truth, "I started doing more hero work, and it's getting to me. I'm pulling back on it though. Hazel asked me to pick up her shifts at the coffee shop, so I'll be there a bit more often."

"That's good, take baby steps. Remember that you're way stronger than the heroes, and than you think you are."

There it was again. He tried not to focus on the small high her encouragement gave him. It was becoming dangerous.

"Thanks. I'll make more candy-inspired drinks with that in mind."

She snickered. "Here you go again."

Jamie's heart felt a bit lighter, and he found himself smiling. "Can't help it."

A bit of silence fell between them, then Daija broke it. "Jamie?"

"Yes?"

"I really hate arguing with you."

He felt as if someone carved into his chest and squeezed a tight hand around his heart. He swallowed hard, then spoke, "I do too, and I'm sorry."

"We'll talk," she said. In person when I get back, she didn't have to add.

"We'll talk."

Someone called her name, and she quickly told him, "I have to go. I'll try calling you when I have time."

"Alright. Talk to you later."

When he ended the call, he rested his head against the wall of his bedroom and sighed deeply. Soon, he found himself walking to the desk in his living room, sitting down in the chair and staring at the wall of post-it notes.

Since Justin had talked to him about what happened the week he moved out of their mom's house, Jamie had been wondering what else he wasn't able to remember. How much did his brain just shut out? He had multiple small theories written on his wall.

He thought about all of his outbursts lately-- especially towards Daija. She was the one person who didn't deserve any of it, yet she was getting the worst of it. He cared about her, but because he hated her relationship with Simon, he was angry. He hated that part of himself more than anything, because it was deeply hurting his friendship.

Then he thought about how much he liked manipulating the heroes-- either through the juice he made or through blackmail. Justin and Fiona love the juice the most, which he suspected because their power usage requires more energy. As far as Aniya, he liked the subtle fear in her eyes whenever she saw him and remembered their conversation at the facility.

Another part of himself that he hated. It reminded him too much of Justin and even Ian. He promised himself years ago that he'd never hurt people the way they did, but here he was.

He didn't feel like himself, but could he come to that conclusion if he didn't have a clue about who he was outside of his abilities and the influence of other people?

He didn't want to be angry, he didn't want to hurt people, he didn't want to keep causing trouble in his closest friendship. Then at the same time, he was angry, he wanted Aniya and the others to pay, and he wanted to make sure that Daija wouldn't be going anywhere.

The sick thoughts made him nauseous all of a sudden, and he bit his tongue to snap out of it. Immediately, he picked up a pen and started scribbling more notes as a distraction. His vision blurred, and two wet drops landed on his desk. Tears.

I'm losing my mind.